The Strongest Office Clerk
by TwoTacoesTuesday
Summary: A year after Saitama started his training as a hero, he got a job! This fanfiction will contain OC's, but mostly only as Saitama's work colleagues. Slight slice-of-life content. Updates on 1st and 10th of every month. Every major character will have a job/respectable position based on their abilities. (On Hiatus [Sadly])
1. Chapter 1: The Strongest Office Clerk

**Author Note:**

 **It's my first time writing, so yes. If you say this looks amateur-ish, you're 100% right. I willingly accept any criticisms, suggestions, etc as they will help me improve my story. Criticisms are fine, harsh ones are okay too. But pure hate with no real reason (or logical ones) can, and most likely will, be either be ignored or sarcastically responded with. Or, you know, some people will do it for me. I'm talking about you, Halofan2112. A popular flaming target, and for good reason, that guy. (Yes, he's famous, heard of him even before I decided to open my own account.)**

 **And I don't own One Punch Man or their characters, which belong to both ONE and Yusuke Murata, blah blah blah. It's FAN + FICTION. Clue's in the name.**

 **In case people were too lazy to either:**

 **A) Read the title**

 **B) Read the summary**

 **This fanfiction is if Saitama wasn't a hero, but instead, got a job as an office clerk. Oh, and he still has his hair.**

* * *

 **Chapter 1: The Strongest Office Clerk**

It was a quiet day at the office. Today was a slow day, mostly because it was a Friday. In one cubicle was an ordinary person who looked as if you could skim over him without even noticing his presence. He had thick, spiky black hair, sharp brown eyes, and looked like your everyday salesman or clerk. Well, he actually was an office clerk, considering he worked here. And currently, he was having problems with his printer.

"Argh... this damn printer..." He sighed, defeated at the hands of a mere printer.

"Hmm? Saitama? Is your printer acting up again?" Another worker, also friend of Saitama's asked him. He had amber hair and green eyes.

"Oh, Hito... Yeah, every time I'm about to finish my report the printer does this, every single time." Saitama said in resignation. "It's happened so many times I've given up on caring about it any more."

"Huh... you can use my printer, if you want. I just finished handing in the sales reports." Hito said. "Also, we've been office buddies for two years now! Just call me by my first name!"

"Sure, but I'm used to just calling everyone by their last name... Helps me whenever I need to speak to clients formally. I've never been able to do it well, really." Saitama said.

"Keep this up, and you'll probably forget everyone's first name! You didn't forget mine, right, Saitama?" Hito asked.

"No... It's just easier for me to stick with this instead of needing to change between formal and informal every time." Saitama said.

Hito snickered. "Well, It's Soba, in case you did forget. Well, if you need me, I'll be at the water cooler!" Soba said jokingly, walking off. And when he was out of sight, Saitama sighed heavily, in relief.

"Crap, I actually forgot his name... Good thing he told me again. Better write that down, just in case. Forgetting someone's first name is way more embarrassing than being informal to clients." Saitama said, taking out a sticky note, and writing down Soba's name, along with a crude drawing of his face. Crude, but it was good enough to be recognized as Soba.

"Well then, better head to his printer to print out our materials reports... Why're we always running out of aluminium, anyway? Every time, the first thing to run out would be the aluminium... better ask boss to restock our aluminium supply..." Saitama said, sending the reports straight to Soba's computer, and then headed straight for Soba's cubicle.

 **{Soba's Cubicle...}**

 _" Is this even okay?"_ Saitama thought, in response to Soba's workplace. Well, his desk and his entire cubicle was clean and tidy, but...

"Do people even- why do people even do this?" Saitama said, picking up a magazine of *cough* acquired tastes *cough*, which Saitama was pretty sure the company doesn't allow whatsoever. And the only reason Saitama noticed them was because Soba's desk drawer was open and the magazine he was holding was only the first one on the stack of other... tastes.

"I think I'll just put this back where it belongs." Saitama said, putting the magazine back in the drawer, and closing it. After accessing Soba's computer and receiving the file he sent earlier, Saitama proceeded to print out the reports.

 **[After 5 minutes...]**

Saitama finished printing his reports, and placed them in a file binder, and headed to the boss's office.

Saitama knocked on the door, and after a brief moment, a soft 'come in' was heard from the other side of the door. Saitama opened the door, and his boss was sitting at his desk, in the middle of his office.

The boss was... unexpectedly cute. His face lacked any masculine features, instead more feminine, or rather, he was just like a young boy. His hair was gold-blonde, and his eyes were blue. Not to mention he was just 160 cm tall.

"Ah, Saitama! I believe those are our materials reports?" He said, in a cutely soft voice. He really was like a young boy. Despite that, he was older than Saitama by a year, at 26 years old.

"Yes, boss. And as usual, we're running out of aluminium." Saitama said, handing the reports to the boss.

"Saitama... just call me by my first name! We've known each other ever since our internship, this sudden seniority is slightly uncomfortable, really!" the boss said, raising his hands halfway.

"Sure... Awada." Saitama said, his eyes darted to the gold name-plate with Awada's name on it. " _I really need to keep a name-book for everyone I know... seriously."_ Saitama internally sighed at his inability to remember names.

"That's much better!" He said, so innocently cute it seemed as if there were flowers and rabbits appearing behind him. He was always this bubbly and energetic.

"If that's all, I'll be going now." Saitama said, walking out of the office.

"Please, take a break at the lounge!" Awada said, waving at Saitama. He really was just as bubbly as his name.

"I think I'll go look for Hito... what was his first name again... Soma, no, Soka? Nah.. can't be... Sora?" Saitama said, forgetting Soba's name within just around 10 minutes of being told.

 **{At the water-cooler...}**

"Oh, Saitama!" Soba said, noticing Saitama walking towards the cooler.

"Hey, Soba." Saitama said. Before going to the water cooler, Saitama went back to his cubicle to write another sticky note with Awada's name and another crude drawing of his face, and while doing so took another look at Soba's name, remembering it again, since he was going to the water cooler anyway.

"So, you done with the reports?" Soba asked.

"Yep. Today's pretty slow, so work was easier compared to the other days." Saitama responded. "Also, your drawer was open..."

"WH- what?" Soba said, nearly yelling but managed to control himself in time. "Y-you didn't see anything, okay?" Soba said, trembling in fear, taking out a 10,000 yen note.

"Dude. Lock it next time. I don't really care but I can't say the same with other people." Saitama said, grabbing a water cup and filling it with water. "Also, yes. I closed your desk drawer for you." Saitama said, also taking the 10,000 yen note. He was never one to say 'no' to money.

"Phew! Man, you're a lifesaver! As thanks for that, I'll treat you to some Udon for dinner!" Soba said, relieved, as if he was just saved from a building fire.

"Cool. Anyway, I'm just here for some water. I'm going to the lounge for a sandwich after this." Saitama said, drinking the last of his water, and headed for the lounge. In the meantime, Soba went back to his cubicle and locked his desk drawer, just in case.

 **{The lounge...}**

The lounge was well decorated and there were many add-ons, like a refrigerator, juicer, a STOVE, it was like a house. Well, then again, mostly because the lounge area is an entire floor, with a small room in the middle for children, in case some workers needed to bring their children along. In fact, there were quite a few children in there. And there was only ONE lounge area in the whole building, which was why it took up an entire floor. It was also exactly in the middle of the building.

Extravagant? Maybe. Useful? Very. This fact was what made a lot of employees who were also parents love the place. Well, along with a lot of other great benefits, such as flexible working hours, good pay, almost negligible requirements, free training, a low-cost healthcare plan and all-in-all a great working environment. All of that was what attracted Saitama to work here. But mainly it was due to the 'no job experience required'.

 _"Seriously. What's the deal with needing job experience for starter jobs? I mean, 5 years of job experience before 21? That's possible, but no. There aren't a lot of jobs that let you work at that age, and neither do a lot of schools let you work at all."_ Saitama thought.

Still, it was great that they don't ask for a lot of requirements, or else he wouldn't be able to find a job at all. Everything else either paid peanuts or needed stupid requirements. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised if they ask for '10 years job experience before 18' anytime soon. But thankfully, this company didn't ask for anything stupid. Hell, they're one of- if not the best companies to work at, if you didn't have any job experience, or any experience for that matter.

"Oh, it's Saitama!" Another voice sounded from Saitama's back, and when he turned around, it was another friend of his. She had twin-tails, brown hair, and hazel eyes.

"Ah, Buki. Here for some juice?" Saitama asked.

"How'd you know?" She asked, surprised.

"Every time you're here, the only thing I've ever seen you do is drink the complimentary juice." Saitama said, grabbing a sandwich wrapped in plastic from the basket on the counter.

"Oh, really? I never noticed that..." She said blankly, thinking back. "Yeah, you're right. I've practically never done anything else but drink juice at the lounge..."

"Well, is your group project coming along?" Saitama asked, unwrapping the sandwich and taking a bite. "Ugh, it's seaweed and mayonnaise. Who even comes up with these sandwiches?" Saitama complained. There were strange fillings to the sandwiches sometimes.

"The group project is coming along well!" She said happily, but then became dejected. "But I always pull the group down..."

"Clumsy as usual?" Saitama asked, which only made her more depressed.

"Yes... everyone always says it's okay, but every single time a mistake happens, it's because of me!" Buki said, pouting.

"Well, it should be okay. I mean, everyone's fine with it, aren't they?" Saitama said, trying to console her. But it wasn't very convincing, with a mouthful of seaweed and mayo sandwich.

"No, being the main source of the problem isn't fine!" She said, hitting Saitama on the head. Almost immediately after, she winced and recoiled in pain. "Owwwww! Saitama! Why is your head so hard!?" She said, rubbing her hand. There was a black-blue spot on her hand where it collided with Saitama's head.

"That's because you hit so hard. If you didn't hit so hard, you'd probably feel less pain. Anyway, I'm getting back to work." Saitama said, throwing away the plastic wrapper, before heading back to his work-floor. While Saitama was doing that, Buki took a bottle of cold water and placed it beside her hand to dull the pain.

"Ow... Is he made of steel?" She said to herself.

 **{Saitama's Cubicle...}**

Saitama's cubicle was just your everyday cubicle, computer, printer, and a slot for assignments and completed ones. Well, the only thing was different was that on his desk, was a massive pile of fliers, all about sales. His rubbish bin was chocked full of fliers of sales which were over, and at the end of every day, there would be at least one flier in the bin, and sometimes, it would be entirely filled with it, much to the dismay of the janitor.

"Well then, that was the last of the remaining assignments. Hmm, maybe I should've gotten another sandwich..." Saitama said, but when he remembered the seaweed and mayo combination...

"...I think I'll pass."

"Pass on what?" Soba said, appearing from behind Saitama's cubicle.

"Huh? No, I was just thinking about what to do after work." Saitama responded.

"Well, how about go for some Udon? I'm serious about paying you for helping me out earlier." Soba said.

"I dunno... Let me check if there's a sale today..." Saitama said, checking through his stack of fliers.

"You and your sales... I wouldn't be surprised if you end up saving more than a million yen from your savings through those sales anytime soon..." Soba joked.

"Huh, there is one today. 15% off on fish." Saitama said, holding up a flier.

"The Udon place I'm at has a 'Buy 2 Free 1' promotion." Soba said, and that instantly got Saitama's attention.

"I suppose the sale can wait until tomorrow..." Saitama said, looking at the date of the sale, which lasted until tomorrow, at 3 p.m.

"Great! I've also invited Yona, so you're getting the free bowl!" Soba said, happy that Saitama was coming.

"Yona? Who's that?" Saitama asked, to which Soba tsukkomi-ed.

"Yona! The clumsy one!" He said, shocked that Saitama didn't recognize her.

"The clumsy one... you mean Buki?" Saitama asked.

"Yes! Buki! Buki Yona! Jeez, you've actually forgotten her real name!" Soba said, face-palming. "Seriously, lighten up a little! No need to constantly address others with their surname! You are actually forgetting people's real name from using their surnames too much!"

"Alright, alright. Still, where's the place?" Saitama asked.

"Oh, it's near City J, right beside the commuting station, so it's pretty close by." Soba responded.

"Okay then. Let's go there after work." Saitama said.

"Great! Oh, by the way-" Soba wanted to say something, but then was interrupted by an explosion, which shook the whole building.

"W-what was that!?" A cute voice sounded from behind both Soba and Saitama, and as they turned around, it was their adorable boss, Awada.

"Boss? What're you doing here?" Soba asked.

"I was looking for Saitama earlier, I wanted to talk to him about a group project that was coming up- but never mind that, what happened earlier?" Awada asked.

"I don't know... there was a loud noise and the whole building shook!" Soba replied.

"Ah, there's the source of the explosion." Saitama pointed out the window, since they were right beside the window panes, and could see right outside. And on the outside, was a massive mushroom cloud in the distance.

"W-what the... get down!" Soba said, realizing the shock-wave hadn't let up yet, and pushed both Saitama and Awada to the ground. A good choice, considering soon the building was hit with another shock-wave, and the windows cracked and broke into pieces. Had Soba not saved the both of them, they would probably have been pelted with sharp glass pieces.

"I-it's an attack! Everybody evacuate!" Awada yelled out, and mass panic ensued.

"Everyone! Please exit the building in a formerly order! This is not a drill! Please evacuate as soon as possible!" The security guards were at each exits, controlling the situation and keeping order to stop and prevent panic.

"W-what's happening!?" Soba said, looking out the windows, and saw that almost everything else had been razed to the ground, with other buildings destroyed, and only the biggest and tallest of the buildings survived. The one they were in being one of them.

"There's an explosion, obviously! We need to evacuate! Let's go!" Awada said, pulling both Saitama and Soba to the exits.

 **[10 minutes later...]**

"Where is this again?" Saitama asked, looking around. They were in a large area with a really high ceiling, and it was packed with a lot of people.

"This is the building's bunker, we're underground. Really, Saitama. Did you even read the employee instruction manual at all?" Awada reprimanded. Well, from the tone of his voice, it sounded more like a question.

"Halfway, actually. I lost the book afterwards. I still can't find it." Saitama answered truthfully.

Awada sighed. "Remind me to get you a new one next time..."

"Still, what was that?" Soba asked. "It doesn't seem like a terrorist attack, I mean... what terrorist organization would have enough firepower to rival a nuke?"

"Who knows... hopefully it isn't a mysterious being..." Awada replied.

"Dammit, why does this have to happen today, of all days?" Soba complained. "This sucks, doesn't it, Saitama?" Soba said, turning to look at Saitama, but he was gone.

"Eh? Where's Saitama..." Soba asked.

"Hmm, he's probably looking for the toilet." Awada suggested. "Well, I'm going to go get some water. Wanna come with, Soba?" Awada asked.

"Sure, why not. I mean, I don't think he'd do something as foolish as go out in the open, when the safety of the bunker is right here." Soba said to himself, and followed Awada to get a drink.

 **[On the outside...]**

Contrary to their expectations, Saitama was indeed outside of the building. The guards tried to stop him, but when he said he wanted to go to the toilet, they simply let him through.

"If they can be tricked that easily, I don't think they're very fit for the job..." Saitama said, looking back. As he stepped outside, there was nothing but utter annihilation of the surroundings.

"That's a lot of damage..." Saitama looked around, commenting on the sheer scale of the destruction. He then looked back at the building, which was standing strong. Despite that, all the windows were gone, and some of the building's concrete was also blown off.

"The repairs are gonna cost a lot..." Saitama said, scratching his head. "Seriously. What sort of irresponsible jerk would do this?" Saitama asked rhetorically.

Suddenly, he heard the sound of crying nearby.

"Papa! Mama!" It was the voice of a little girl who was crying.

"Better check that out..." Saitama said, heading to the source of the voice. When he got closer, he saw a little girl crying, exactly what he heard...

...And a massive purple humanoid-thing was walking towards the little girl. It extended it's arm, which then grew to an enormous size, it's hand already enveloping the entirety of the girl, and it grasped it's hands to crush the girl into a bloody pulp-

At least, that was what was expected.

As he opened his hand, there wasn't anything in it, lacking the bloody viscera which the monster had expected. It looked around, and found the girl.

She was caught in time by someone wearing a suit, whom laid her on the ground safely.

The monster's hand went back to it's original size, and it asked, "And who are you?" It asked, pure malice and venom in it's voice. Saitama got up, and responded a generic:

"I'm just your everyday office clerk."

The monster, aggravated by this, assumed that he was mocking it.

"...An office clerk, you say?" It asked.

"Yes, why do you-" Saitama didn't even manage to finish the sentence, before the monster waved it's arm, destroying the whole area where Saitama and the girl was on.

"That's rude. What's with attacking people and everything?" Saitama asked, the little girl carried in his arms in a princess-carry. "Not to mention attacking a little girl. Don't you know that you'll get arrested for pedophilia?" Saitama said, laying her down again. Somehow, she had lost her consciousness.

"Hmph. What do you know? I was formed due to the pollution that you humans caused upon the Earth! I am Vaccine Man!" It introduced itself.

"The Earth is a single, living organism, and you humans constantly pollute it with toxic wastes and rubbish! In retaliation, the Earth has given birth... to ME!" It said, it's body growing larger and larger by the second.

"Constantly causing death and destruction to wildlife at a massive rate... you humans do this for nothing but your own gain! For development? DEVELOPMENT!? What an inane reason to cause such suffering to every other living organism other than yourselves! Yet, what else could be expected from humans-" It got into its own monologue, but as it interrupted Saitama earlier-

So did Saitama interrupt his speech, by a chop to it's large neck, knocking it out. "I guess that much was enough, huh..." Saitama said, looking at his hand. The monster whom transformed into an intimidating appearance slowly reverted to it's earlier form. Then, Saitama grabbed it by the antenna, and dragged it along with him.

"You're paying for the damages, no matter who you are."

 **{Inside the building's bunker...}**

"Oh, Saitama! There you are!" Awada said, his eye caught onto Saitama's figure.

"Hey, Awada. Were you looking for me earlier?" Saitama asked.

"Yeah, Actually, the both of us were. We got some water for you. Where were you earlier anyway?" Soba asked, while handing Saitama a water bottle.

"Oh, I went out to find whoever caused the explosion and I beat them up." Saitama said nonchalantly.

"Haha, good joke, Saitama! No really, you went to the toilet or something earlier, right?" Soba asked again, not believing a word Saitama said.

"Whatever. So how long do we need to be here?" Saitama asked Awada.

"Oh, until they confirm that there is no more danger. When there isn't any dangerous activity happening for at least 15 minutes, anyway." Awada answered.

"Jeez. Fine then." Saitama sighed.

 **[15 minutes later...]**

"Can we get out now?" Saitama asked, bored. "It's 15 minutes."

"Well, we need to wait until security agrees that it's safe, then yes, we can go home for the day." Awada answered.

"Huh, an unexpected bonus to this annoyance." Saitama nonchalantly said.

"You can say that again, but it makes sense. I mean, after an explosion like that, the whole building isn't exactly a safe workplace anymore! I wouldn't be surprised if the gave us leave because of this, actually." Soba said, eating a piece of cream-bread that was provided with the water.

"I guess. So when are they going to-" Saitama wanted to ask, but it was answered with an announcement.

"Threat is no longer present. Please leave the bunker by following the exits." A pre-recorded line was played over an over again over the loudspeakers, and bit by bit the workers in the bunker slowly left the bunker. Saitama, Soba, and Awada included.

As they exit the building, the devastation to the city was quickly noticed, but the building they worked in was mainly unharmed, aside from needing new windows and a repainting. Everything else... wasn't so lucky.

"Phew... thankfully the main building was still standing strong, or else we'd need to crawl out of debris." Soba said, looking at the state of all the other buildings.

"Yep. Anyway, want to go eat Udon at that place you mentioned earlier, Soba?" Saitama asked.

"Sure. Where's Yona, anyway?" Soba said, looking around for Yona.

"Soba! There you are!" A familiar voice said, and as they turned to the source of the voice, it was their clumsy friend Yona, running towards them... who had literally tripped on nothing, and fell on her head.

"Y-Yona! Are you okay!?" Soba asked, helping her up.

"Ugh... Why am I always so clumsy!?" She said, rubbing her forehead.

"Still, today you're even less clumsy than usual. You only tripped 4 times today. It's an improvement, at least." Saitama said, which lead to Soba and Awada looking at Saitama with expressions which urged him to stop.

" _Idiot! That'll just upset her more!"_ Soba thought in his mind, not wanting to voice it out.

" _This is bad... why'd Saitama need to point it out!?"_ Awada did the same thing.

But contrary to expectations, Yona's facial expression changed into excitement. "Really!? Only four times today?" Yona asked, not believing it.

"Yep. Only four times that I noticed, anyway. That's still an improvement. Usually I'd see you trip at least 12 times on a daily basis." Saitama said nonchalantly, while taking a sip out of a juice-box.

"Yahoo! I'm getting less clumsy!" She said, jumping for joy. Meanwhile, Awada and Soba were watching on the sideline, the both of them thinking the same thing.

"... _Is she really happy about that?"_

 **{The Udon Place In City J...}**

"The Udon here is really great!" Awada said, slurping his noodles.

When everyone left the building after the attack, Awada was invited by Soba to the Udon restaurant where he treated Saitama and Yona to Udon. Currently, everyone was enjoying a bowl of Udon. Saitama's bowl was the free one, whereas the two bowls were given to Soba and Yona. Awada bought his own bowl.

"I have to say, this is some good Udon." Saitama said, eating the Udon.

"Right? Right? I told you this place is great!" Soba said, eating his own, while Yona was absorbed into eating the Udon she didn't even notice anything else around her.

"So, you four enjoying the noodles?" A middle-aged and slightly obese uncle asked from behind the counter.

"Yep! Your Udon never ceases to impress, eh, Uncle?" Soba responded to the uncle.

"Oh, you're related to him?" Awada asked.

"Yep, this is my uncle. He owns this shop, obviously. I come here to help him from time to time, during the weekends." Soba replied.

"Okay, I'm full. I'll be going first." Saitama said, standing up.

"Have a safe trip, Saitama!" Soba responded.

"Bye, Saitama!" Yona said, a mouthful of Udon in her mouth, which made her sentence barely discernible.

"Saitama, work should be put on hold until the building is refurbished and it's ensured that the workplace is safe, so I'll call you whenever we can go back to work on your phone, okay?" Awada asked.

"Sure. I'll get going, then." Saitama said, leaving the shop.

 **{Saitama's Apartment...}**

"I'm back, phew." Saitama sighed, as he threw his briefcase on the floor, took of his suit and hung it in his wardrobe. His threw his tie on his bed, and sat down on a chair.

But as soon as he sat upon the chair, the doorbell rung.

"What is it this time?" Saitama, slightly annoyed, got up and answered the door.

It was the landlord.

"Saitama, you're finally here, dammit! I've been trying to get to you for over a week now! Where's this month's rent!?" He asked, waving his cane.

"Hey, stop that. " Saitama said, moving the cane away. "Anyway, a week? I never even noticed you. When do you look for me?" Saitama asked.

"Usually at least twice, at 8 in the morning, and 6 in the evening. You're practically never there! But since you've been smart enough to turn off everything whenever you leave, unlike some other idiot tenants, I'm taking 10% off the rent amount, just for you." He said.

"Really? Thanks!" Saitama said, happy at this turn of events. A 10% decrease in rental? That may not seem much, but hey, it's something!

"But still, When are you available? I'm tired of going back to check on you, just to see you're not back yet." The landlord asked. "Whenever you pay me on your own accord it's normal, but whenever I find you myself, I can never even get a glimpse of your shadow."

"Oh, I leave for work at 6 in the morning, and I come back by 8 at night, usually. But on Fridays we work less so I get back by 3 in the afternoon." Saitama answered.

"But you're back now at 1 p.m?" The landlord asked.

"Oh, our workplace at City-A was attacked by some mysterious being, so we get the rest of the day off. Oh, and also until they deem the building safe for work again." Saitama nonchalantly said.

"I see... But still, where's this month's rent?" The landlord asked again.

"How much is it?" Saitama asked, taking out his wallet.

"About 55,000 yen normally. Minus 10%, it's just about 50,000 yen." He answered.

"10...20..30...40... here, 50,000 yen." Saitama said, counting out five 10,000 yen bills and giving them to the landlord.

"Still..." The landlord hesitated.

"Hmm? What is it?" Saitama asked.

"If I'm not mistaken, your job should be quite good. Why not just get a house by loaning money from a bank? Why rent my dirt-cheap apartment, anyway?" The landlord asked questioningly. From what he heard, Saitama worked at a rather renowned place which had good pay and low requirements. Saitama somehow got the job, despite the huge competition to get a job there.

"I'm not complaining, mind you. The other tenants are tenacious in delaying rent, I'll give them that. You're the only one who pays rent in time. Relatively, anyway." The landlord added.

"Oh, I just figured it'd be cheaper." Saitama answered, closing the door.

The landlord looked at the five 10,000 yen bills in his hand, and shook his head.

"Well, whatever he's comfortable with."

 **{Inside the apartment...}**

Saitama washed his hands as he took out a spring onion from the fridge and sliced them thinly. He looked in the fridge and saw that there was still some beef left over.

"I guess it's curry tonight, then." Saitama said to himself, when he caught a glimpse of a packet of curry powder on the table.

As he got to cooking, Saitama's mind wandered around, as it was relatively easy to make the dish. While that, his eyes floated to his wardrobe, and his old hero costume came into view. It was mostly yellow with a pair of red gloves and boots. It also had a large zipper on the front.

 _"Huh... I remember when that old man gave it to me while I was still on the streets at the time, after I was kicked out by my old landlady."_ Saitama thought.

" _I wonder... what was it that made me want to become a hero back then?"_

 _"Back then, huh... I think it was to find a thrilling fight?"_

 _"I also wanted to make my mark on the world, by defeating all the monsters in sight..."_

 _"Still, I haven't done anything noteworthy while I was still a hero, other than defeating more monsters."_

 _"But nothing has changed since then. There's still monsters running around."_

 _"I got this job, and I have a steady income, now."_

 _"But I still haven't really changed anything, have I..."_

Saitama's thought was then interrupted by a 'ding' from his smartphone.

He then checked to see what was it about. It was a few notifications from the social media app, Bookface.

The first notification was Soba making noodles. The noodles were outstretched, and it looked like he was doing some stunts while he was at it.

"Job may have been interrupted, but that means I can make noodles more often! #BestNoodlesInTown"

Scrolling down, it was an image of Yona, enjoying a massive bowl of ice-cream with a couple other friends.

"Largest Ice-Cream in existence, so says the store. Biggest or not, we're finishing this! #RaskinBobbins"

Below that, was a video of Awada teaching algebra. His nickname was 'The Adorable Sensei' online, where he teaches subjects for free.

"...to expand this function, there are some methods to do so. My preferred method would be to..."

Saitama stopped the video, and turned off his phone.

As he reminisced about everything that happened in his life, he said to himself:

"Well... I guess it's not all that bad."

And then, the curry was done.

* * *

 **Chapter 1 is done! Let me know what you readers think. Also, there's more information below:**

 **1) The landlord is another person not from the original manga, being different form the old landlady from the OVA. Saitama got a job, so this time, he can actually pay rent, this time, instead of squatting in a building in the abandoned area.**

 **2) Saitama got the job around 1 year after he started training.**

 **3) Saitama will NOT be as strong as his original bald-counterpart, since he didn't train enough to have his hair fall out. He stopped before that happened. But he still will be strong enough so that there is practically no difference.**


	2. Chapter 2: The Lone Private Investigator

**Chapter 2: The Lone Private Investigator**

* * *

"...reports that there is a massive outbreak of mosquitoes, and there are also accounts of animals throughout the city, whose bodies were sucked dry, without any remaining blood within their carcasses. Investigations conclude..."

"Man, that's bad." Saitama said, hearing the news on the television. "There seems to be a lot of them these days.." Saitama said once more, sipping his morning coffee. He was never really one for coffee, but he had just run out of tea. He was about to go get some before noticing a huge bag of coffee powder.

"Forgot that I won these in the Annual Dinner Raffle." Saitama said to himself, taking another sip of the coffee. "At least it isn't the obnoxiously bitter kind." It was 3-in-1 coffee, which consists of coffee powder, non-dairy creamer, and sugar.

As the destruction to the main building was still not yet resolved, Saitama was free, until they finished refurbishing the building, anyway. That was good, Saitama was hoping they'd replace it soon. There was some uneven flooring right around his cubicle, and it bugged him slightly. Sure, he didn't want the monster attack to happen, but hey, every cloud had a silver lining, no matter how dim and unnoticeable it was.

"Saitama! Open up!" An elderly voice came from the other side of the door. Obviously, it was the landlord. He was wearing a cable-knit vest with a cashmere sweater underneath, and a pair of brown jeans.

"Hmm? Is there anything you need? I thought I just paid the rent yesterday?" Saitama asked.

"It's not that. It's just that there's been an evacuation warning for the entirety of City-Z. You're not coming?" The landlord asked. "Everyone already left."

"Oh? What's it about?" Saitama replied with a question.

"Well, it's about a massive outbreak of mosquitoes. I have no idea how is that a Demon-level threat, but we better evacuate, just in case." The landlord answered.

"I'm planning to go to City K for a 15% off sale, so I'll be going away from here anyway." Saitama said, holding up a flier.

"Really? What's the sale on?" The landlord asked, pushing his spectacles up to his nose. "My eyes aren't so good nowadays..."

"15% sale off fish. There's also another sale, 48% off bean-curds only, at the same place." Saitama responded, handing the landlord another flier.

"Hmm... well, I guess I can treat myself to some bean-curds then! Lead the way, Saitama." The landlord said, smiling.

"Oh yeah, I forgot how much you liked them. Okay, let's go." Saitama said, pocketing the sale flier.

"Before that..." The landlord asked.

"Yeah?"

"You might wanna wear something other than that shirt you're wearing..." The landlord said, pointing at Saitama's choice of wear.

Saitama was wearing a pair of black shorts, which were normal, but Saitama's shirt was purple, and literally had an image of a gold poop on it. Below the logo were the words 'Zeniru Ice-Cream'.

"Ah... well, I hadn't gotten ready yet, so I was just wearing whatever seemed comfortable... give me a minute." Saitama said, going into his room.

"Huh... seems like you keep your room well." The landlord said, stepping inside Saitama's apartment.

"Yeah, well, it's where I live, isn't it?" Saitama answered, rummaging through his closet for something presentable.

"Still, every time I see the other tenants, the condition of their rooms make me sick. Literally." The landlord commented.

"What kinds of tenants do you even have? Anyway, I've got something that's okay." Saitama said, changing his shirt. And as the landlord turned around, Saitama was wearing a shirt which was totally blank, save for the middle which had a weird... thing on it. It was like a cartoon-ish crudely-drawn mouse, but it had the face of a human.

"You know what... that's at least a step-up. Okay, let's go then." The landlord said.

 **{Meanwhile...}**

On the streets of City Z, there lay the dried body of someone robbing a jewelry store, and not far above, was a weird river of black streams flowing into it. At a closer inspection, it was no stream, but a massive swarm of mosquitoes.

Far from there, on the top of a building, was a man. He was wearing a black suit, and a brown overcoat. What was strange, however, was that the whites of his eyes, the sclera, were black, instead of white, and his irises were a powerful glow of orange. He was blonde, and most intriguing of all, was that his hands were metallic, and his arms were strangely shaped, with sharp ends jutting out from the brown overcoat.

"Acquiring target." It said, looking at the massive swarm of mosquitoes.

Following the large swarm of mosquitoes, he noticed that there were more than just one swarm of mosquitoes. There were more and more 'rivers' of mosquitoes, all converging into a single place, forming a large core of mosquitoes.

Right in the middle, there was a reddish glow, which was most likely blood, but slowly, the glow dimmed, and as it disappeared completely, the mosquitoes dispersed, leaving a person in the middle.

It was a woman, but she looked as if she was wearing a skimpy and highly sexual mosquito-cosplay costume.

"Jeez... that wasn't nearly enough! Go and find more blood for me!" She said, her voice sensual.

"So you're the one controlling the mosquitoes." The person who was on top of the building said, catching the attention of the mosquito-woman hybrid. When she looked around, he was already on the ground.

"You control the minds of the mosquitoes, and they suck blood, while you take it from them. So if I take out the leader, you, will the rest of the swarm disperse?" He asked.

Instead of answering, she smiled, and commanded, "Our next meal is here. Go drain him dry."

The mosquitoes, following her order, swarmed to the person, intending to suck his blood.

But as they had just reached him-

"Incinerate."

A gout of fire burst from his figure, burning the swarm. As the smoke subsided, his hand was revealed to have a hole in his palm, which had flames which came from his palm.

"I am here to eliminate you. Stay right there." The cyborg said, raising his hand, aiming at the mosquito-woman.

 **{Somewhere else in the abandoned area...}**

"Are you sure that this is the right way?" Saitama asked for the fifth time in the span of 10 minutes.

"Just trust me already! I know a shortcut, so stop asking me already!" The landlord snapped.

After Saitama showed the landlord the address, he instantly stopped in his tracks, and pointed at a direction, yelling, "I HAVE A SHORTCUT!", whilst running towards it like a madman.

 _"Must be one of those crazy moments of his. I can't tell if he really is just senile, or he's secretly a genius."_ Saitama thought to himself.

Once, Saitama had met him while that old coot went gambling. But whenever he plays poker, he's always the first to fold, even if his cards were good. Saitama knew this because of a company-trip to a casino for relaxation and business, Saitama recognized the old man playing poker somewhere in the corner.

Every time he was there, the old man would fold. Always. Even when his cards were the winning ones, he would just fold. But when they left the building, the landlord turned in his winnings, which consisted of... 5 million yen. It was quite the sight, when he left the casino with a briefcase packed with cash. Even Saitama had to rub his eyes to check if he was seeing it right.

"We're close! Come on! Can't let ourselves be late for the offer!" The landlord yelled, running like no tomorrow.

Saitama sighed, running after him. Another time, there was this one young lady who would constantly challenge the old man or something. She had purple hair and brown eyes, and she seemed like she was just in her first year of high-school. Usually she was accompanied with a blonde-haired guy who was probably her classmate.

Whenever they were around, the whole building would get noisy. Whenever they left, the purple-haired girl and the boy would be in tatters. They would appear wounded, and on some days they left the building limping on one leg. The worst was when the girl's high-school uniform was practically ripped to shreds, while the guy carried her like in a princess-carry, crying along the way, as if she fought in a war or something.

Speaking of which, she seemed really familiar...

When Saitama asked what happened, the landlord simply replied,

"Oh, they challenged me to a game of Shogi. Looks like my past reputation of the 'God-Emperor Of Shogi' is still remembered..."

Saitama, not believing it, then played a round of Shogi with him. The landlord suffered a crushing defeat, and also every single round after that. Saitama never even tried playing with much effort whatsoever. And even then, he didn't know the rules, so the landlord had to explain the rules to him. Saitama was literally a beginner. But the landlord lost. Shortly after explaining something as simple as the basics to him.

"Well, whatever." Saitama said under his breath, following his temporarily-crazy landlord. Mostly to protect him from anything that might happen. Most importantly, protecting the landlord from himself.

Most times his landlord is sane. But whenever his screws pop off, there's no telling what would happen.

 **{The Mosquito-Woman location...}**

The battle between the mosquito-woman hybrid and the cyborg ensued, both of them locked in combat. The cyborg ran up a building to decrease the distance between himself and the mosquito-woman, and when it was sufficient, he leaped off the building, towards the mosquito-woman, aiming a punch at her.

She dodged, and counterattacked with a blow to his chest with her claw-appendages. The cyborg was blown to the grown from this, and as he got up, he aimed his palm towards the mosquito-woman again, launching bolts of fire towards her.

But the mosquito-woman dodged every single one of them, getting closer and closer, and as she approached ever so closely, a long horn extended from her headgear, about to pierce his hand until-

 ***BANG***

 ***BANG***

The cyborg dodged the attack, and pulled out a gun from under his brown overcoat, and shot her in her abdomen and her chest, which exploded. It was a smaller explosion compared to the flames from his palms, but the temperature was much higher, which resulted in a horrible char on her chest and abdomen.

"ARGH!" She growled in pain, flying away from the cyborg.

The cyborg sighed, and took out another gun. Both of them were the same model, and both of them shared the sleek, black look.

"If you thought I was just a rookie, think again. I've been through more than a few fights myself, and I know to never underestimate an opponent." He crossed the two guns together, and as he did, he disappeared from the sight of the mosquito woman.

"Tch! Where'd he go!?" She yelled angrily, holding her burning abdomen in pain, blood leaking out from the wounds. Yes, it was a bit ironic to see a mosquito bleeding.

"Here." She heard from her back, and when she did-

The cyborg was holding a massive sniper rifle that had the same sleek look as the two guns he pulled out earlier. It glowed orange like his eyes, and it looked like the two guns he had taken out earlier went into the rifle, as the magazine holders of the two guns earlier were sticking out from the sides of the rifle, which were also conveniently placed beside what seemed to be hydraulic cylinders. Before the mosquito-woman could do anything, he fired a shot, which pierced through her chest entirely, creating a large hole in between her *cough* assets.

She landed with a thud, and coughed up blood violently. She was on her knees, her breathing ragged and heavy. But considering she had a massive gaping hole in her chest, she was holding up quite well.

The cyborg landed from jumping down the building, and walked slowly towards her. As he got nearer and nearer, finally within arm's reach, he picked her up by the head, and in a intimidating voice, asked,

"Any last words, or other futile attempts?"

She grit her teeth in anger, but it slowly turned into a grin.

"Oh, you're gonna regret not finishing me off instantly." She said, before she yelled out,

"Come, little ones! Empty all your stored juices into me!" As she said that, a large wave of mosquitoes rushed towards her, swarming around her like earlier.

The cyborg backed away from the swarm, inspecting it.

"Hmph. Futile effort. If the blood will simply nourish her, or heal her, then nothing will change." He said, looking at the swarm. "But if she wants this much blood, then it may not simply be a source of food for her..." He said to himself.

"Better destroy them, just in case." He said, raising his right palm, about to burn the whole swarm, until-

"WE'RE ALMOST THERE!" An elderly voice yelled out. Followed by a young voice. "Dammit, old man! If we end up late and miss it, I'll kill you first!"

They came into view not long after, the old man first appearing followed by the young man. The old man was well-dressed, and looked like your everyday upper-middle class man. Following him was a young man wearing a shirt with a ridiculous picture on it and black shorts. Man? Animal? Nothing was enough to describe it.

"Eh? What's that?" The landlord then stopped, and noticed the ultra-massive swarm of mosquitoes in the air.

"Hmm?" Saitama then noticed the massive swarm of mosquitoes.

"Oh... crap." The landlord and Saitama uttered at the same time.

"You two, evacuate immediately. The swarm is conscious, and will attack you if they sense you." The cyborg told them.

"...Seriously?" Saitama asked.

"T-that's bad. We better go-" The landlord said, but then the swarm came crashing down.

"Shit, Saitama, come with me!" The landlord pulled Saitama into a nearby building, and closed the door.

"Smart choice." The cyborg said, before he crouched down, and his hands until his shoulders glowed blue instead of the usual orange, and when the mosquitoes finally crashed downwards in a massive wave, acting like a tsunami that came from the sky-

The entire swarm looked like a big black mountain, when looked at from the outside, but a short while later, there were blue flashes, and then the entire swarm erupted in flames, and the city block that was swathed in mosquito waves, was instead burnt by a massive explosion.

The cyborg's brown overcoat's sleeves were burnt off, revealing his fully mechanical arms.

"Hmph. Since you spoke, I assumed you at least had human-level intelligence. But you were just a bug in the end. After all, you swarmed them up in an easy-to-burn way." the cyborg said. He then looked at his sleeves which were burnt off.

"Maybe I should've taken these off first." He said. "Wait, what about those two, that building can't held up that well..."

"Damn... I told you we should've just taken the ordinary route!" Saitama complained, as he exited the building.

"Oh shush, you. We're almost there! Not my fault a weird mosquito swarm was in the way." The old man said, turning his head in the other direction.

"Wait, what-" The cyborg was confused, how did they manage to survive all that? Sure, they entered the building, but-

Then he realized which building they entered. They came out through a mainly charred metal door, which lead to some stairs. The bottom part of the stairs were charred, however the next flight of stairs remained unscathed.

" _So they climbed up the stairs, avoiding the massive explosion outside. They're quite lucky."_ The cyborg thought.

"HAHAHAHAHA~!" A sensual voice appeared yet again, which belonged to the mosquito-woman.

As they looked up, it was indeed the mosquito girl, but she had changed. Her skin was reddish, and her hair had grown, resulting in a more evil look. If previously it only looked like she was cosplaying an overly-sexualized mosquito, she now seemed more like a mysterious being.

Her assets had grown, too. Though a pointless detail, it is still a detail. It wasn't important to both the cyborg and Saitama, someone else noticed it, and was paying quite a lot of attention to it.

The landlord.

His face went as red as the mosquito-woman's skin, and the cane he needed to support himself fell to the ground, useless, as his body was filled with extreme vigor. His hands had also raised themselves instinctively, and then, made grabbing motions.

Through over decades of experience, his body was reacting to this, his muscle memory acting up. And as he remembered his very first-

"P-p-p-p-pafu... Pafu..." He said, his very body brimming with energy. Thought withered and aged as it was, it felt as if a rising volcano was hidden within him.

Saitama heard the cane drop, and when he turned around-

"Ah... shit. Not again." Saitama said, sighing. "Look, old man. I know what you want to do. I don't mind. You can do whatever you want. But not this time. You. Will. Die. You understand? If you approach her, there will be nothing left of your body to bury but dried bones. So to whatever piece of consciousness still there in your mind, I urge you to grasp at logic, and value your life."

"Oh~?" The mosquito-woman noticed the man, and instead of acting all angry and killing him, she landed right in front of them, and cat-walked to the landlord, further raising his blood-pressure.

"Oi, oi. At this rate, he's gonna die from a heart-attack before you even attempt killing him." Saitama said, pointing at the old man. And he was right.

"He won't. When I'm done with her, there'll be nothing but charred remains of her." The cyborg said, raising his palm.

"Really~?" She said, even more sensual than before, and then, she vanished on the spot.

"Where!?" He said, in an offensive stance, ready to attack at a moment's notice.

"Same trick as you, tin can~." She said, appearing right behind him.

Shocked, he landed a punch, but it was easily blocked by her. She then simply made a swinging motion of her hand, and it split the cyborg nearly into two.

She then threw him into the air, and then, she continuously attacked him so fast, he was stuck in mid-air due to the momentum of the attacks.

"See? You still wanna do 'that'?" Saitama asked his landlord.

"Doesn't matter. I'm going in." The landlord said, and then, the rushed towards the mosquito-woman like no tomorrow.

Saitama sighed heavily.

The mosquito-lady then stopped attacking, letting the cyborg's limp body fall down.

" _...I see. The more blood she consumes, the stronger she becomes. On how damaged I am now... no. Even at full capacity I wouldn't be able to win. As always, even thought I never underestimate enemies, I never follow through with the final blow. It's the end."_

 _"Now, the only thing I can do is... self destruct."_ The cyborg's core then started glowing blue. _"Forgive me, doctor..."_

The mosquito-woman was just about to reach him, but suddenly a massive force on her shoulder had knocked her out cold. It was the young man in the strange shirt.

"Mosquitoes... suck." He said, a small smile on his face.

"Was that a pun, Saitama?" The landlord asked.

"Yep, just came up with it earlier." Saitama answered.

"Well, now that she's out cold..." He said, his face twisting into a perverted smile.

"Yeah... I'll just let you do whatever. I mean, I don't think there should be any laws regarding molesting mysterious beings... or any laws regarding mysterious beings anyway I think?" Saitama said, thinking.

"ITADAKIMASU!" The landlord yelled, jumping straight to the mosquito-woman's unconscious form, and after that the author cannot describe any further or else he'll have to change the rating of the story.

Changing the viewpoint, the cyborg had a look of shock on his face. Saitama then walked off, wanting to call the landlord to continue their 'shortcut' to City K.

"W-wait! Who are you?" The cyborg asked Saitama.

"Oh, It's Saitama." He answered.

"No, I already heard your name. I'd like to ask whether do you work as a professional hero?" The cyborg clarified.

"Oh. No, nothing like that." Saitama answered. "I'm just your everyday office clerk."

"I see... then... make me your disciple!" He asked out of the blue.

Saitama, not registering his request properly, simply replied with a "Huh? Sure." As he walked off. But then, he turned back, to see the determined look on his face.

"Saitama! Let's go!" The landlord yelled, running off in the same direction as earlier.

"Oh, coming!" And he followed suit.

 **[10 minutes later...]**

"Well, at least we got what we wanted." Saitama said, looking at the bag of groceries he had.

"See? I told you the shortcut works!" The landlord said, holding up two plastic bags full of tofu with both hands.

" _I will never know how we managed to get here in 5 minutes after that mosquito-lady was knocked out, but whatever. At least we weren't late."_ Saitama thought, looking at his phone, which said, 2:45 p.m. So if they were late by 15 minutes, the sale would've ended.

"Mackerel, canned tuna, sardines, egg tofu..." Saitama said aloud, checking what he just bought.

"Alright. Saitama. Wanna head back the same way? Or just with the commuter station?" The landlord asked.

"Well then, Mr Directions, lead the way." Saitama sarcastically responded.

"Follow me!" The landlord, ignoring the mockery, walked in the same direction they approached.

Lo and behold, they arrived back home within another 10 minutes, defying the laws of thermodynamics, by traversing literal cities with a couple turns here and there around the corners, as a few extra kilometers came from walking around what, 500 meters.

 **{Outside the apartment...}**

"Well then, thanks for inviting me to the sale. I'm having a feast with this!" The landlord said, before entering his own room, the one on the ground floor.

Saitama went up the stairs to his room on the fifth floor, and opened the door.

He then set down the groceries on the table, and then opened the fridge.

"Egg-tofu with garlic sauce for dinner, then." Saitama said, when noting he still had another carton of eggs in his fridge. He also bought frozen egg-tofu, so would that make it egg-fried egg tofu? Saitama couldn't care less.

Looking at the clock, it was still 3 in the afternoon. Deciding it was too early to cook, Saitama then went ahead and did whatever he wanted for the rest of the day.

 **{A dark room...}**

In the room, it was poorly illuminated, with the only light source coming from a screen.

"It seems that Mosquito-Girl was defeated." A man in a sharp black suit, grey tie, a pair of spectacles and hair parted to the side asked, looking at the reports.

"Yes. However, she still lives. The person that defeated her had merely knocked her out. The fact that our chip implant still works indicates her brain still functions. So at least, she is alive. Her whereabouts however cannot be located." Another person wearing a white pair of clothing answered. His face wasn't visible due to the lack of lighting.

"The chip was damaged, considering it is malfunctioning. After all, the chip does work, but it indicates that her position is literally right at our front doorstep. The moment she was defeated, we had drones sent to locate her body, but to no avail. so she is alive, however her location is unknown." The white-clothed man stated, handing the man in the suit a clipboard with other reports on them.

"Interesting... so this plain-looking man defeated our Mosquito-Girl, whom managed to defeat the infamous 'Demonic-Detective', also known as Genos, the best man as well as the founder of Efficient-Investigations Detective Agency?" The man asked, the screen flashing to depict an image of the person with his hand stretched halfway outwards after a chop.

"Yes. The image taken was the latest received frame of a video which contains everything she saw." The white-clothed person answered.

"I see. Prepare our special task force to find this person. But first, we find mosquito-girl. She may not be that strong now, but she is still one of our top combatants." The man ordered.

"Yes, sir." The white-clothed man said, and left the room.

The man sitting behind the desk sighed, as he looked at the person who defeated Mosquito-girl.

"An interesting specimen... The House Of Evolution must have it." He said.

 **{Saitama's apartment room...}**

"Huh... I wonder what the old man did with that mosquito-lady." Saitama said aloud, while reading a manga. "Meh, not important."

 **[15 minutes later, the House Of Evolution...}**

In another room, the same person as earlier was looking at other specimens kept in large glass chambers. Apart from the already-dispatched task force, these creatures were results of genetic manipulation. The success rate was rather low, but it was something nonetheless.

"Hmm, I wonder what would be yielded if we spliced the genome of a lion with an eagle, and left it to grow? Would it become the legendary griffin, or what would evolution decide as the best design?" The man wondered aloud, and wrote it down on his clipboard.

"Sir! The task force have found Mosquito-girl!" A voice came over the radio transceiver he had on his belt.

"And? Why the panic?" He asked calmly, still jotting down notes on his clipboard.

"Well, she was found... exactly where the chip said she was. Right in front of the building." The voice replied.

"Hmm? Then why have we not found her the whole time? The cameras didn't catch any footage, as well, right?" The man asked, holding the clipboard and pen in one hand, holding the transceiver on the other.

"She... was hung from her legs upside down, right above the gate. She's unconscious."

The clipboard and pen fell from his hands.

"What? Did the others not notice her when she was hung upside down?" He asked again.

"No. They looked around, but didn't see her. The task force only noticed it when Kamakyuri pointed it out." The voice answered.

"Strange... how did they even find our location? That would mean that they now know of it! Our secrecy is compromised!" He said, agitated.

"We know. We have already executed Order 12, in accordance to the situation." The voice replied.

"I see. At least if they are watching, then they'll probably think our hideout is gone." The man replied, slightly calmer than earlier.

"Also... there was a note stuck on her." The voice said again.

"What did it say?" He asked.

"It said... she was nice material." The voice responded.

"Nice material... was whoever that did this a scientist as well?" He inquired.

"We do not know, sir. But at least we found her." The voice said.

"That is true. Still, how was she sent back here? And who did?" The man wondered aloud.

 **{In the landlord's room...}**

"Ah... I feel alive again." He said, stretching.

"Those... were nice material indeed..." He said to himself, his face vulgar.

* * *

 **Chapter 2 is finished! Let me know what your opinions are. Also, there's more information below.**

 **1) The current setting is just a day after the attack, so Saitama isn't back at his workplace yet. Obviously. They didn't finish cleaning up the building in just one day. Saitama'll be back at his workplace in the next chapter, however.**

 **2) Saitama got his job 12 months after he started training.**

 **3) The landlord's apparent reality-warping powers isn't just as a joke. More will be explained in later chapters on how he achieves this.**


	3. Chapter 3: The Obsessive Chairman (I)

**Chapter 3: The Obsessive Chairman**

* * *

 **[1 week later...]**

Saitama put his black suit over his white shirt, buttoned it, drank some coffee, and put on his shoes. It was time to go back to work.

" _They managed to clean up the place in a week. Huh, they must work fast."_ Saitama thought. They managed to repaint the entire building, as well as replace all of the shattered windows in 7 days. That was rather impressive.

As he walked out his room, he overheard some women talking in the corridor about thugs.

"Just yesterday, when I came home after buying groceries, I took the stairs instead of the lift since there were only light groceries. My apartment was also only on the second floor, so it wasn't all that much a hassle. But then right as I entered, three thugs came near me and asked me to pay a 'toll'!" A woman wearing a red blouse said.

"What is this, the middle ages? What kind of thug uses 'toll' as a pretense? Why not just report it to the police?" Another woman asked.

"For one, I tried reporting to the police already, but then they weren't there at the moment. And the next time I used the stairs, they were right there, waiting for me! They even asked for me to pay 'compensation' for 'disrupting their work'!" The woman in the red blouse complained.

"And it's not like I can refuse them, I tried just turning back to use the lift, but then two of the thugs were already on the both sides of the door, blocking me! I don't think I need to answer why I didn't just try ignoring them?"

"Well, hopefully the landlord can increase security..." The other woman said.

"And increase our rent? No thanks. I think I'll just start taking the lift, despite the inconvenience. Why must my apartment room be so far away from the lift?" The woman in the red blouse sighed.

" _This has been happening lately too, huh?"_ Saitama thought to himself. " _Better take the lift, then. I don't want to deal with any annoyances."_

Saitama then headed for the lift, and as he arrived, there were three rough-looking men, all of them looked like the cliche gangster-type person. Hell, they probably were gangsters.

" _Maybe if I ignore them..."_ Saitama thought to himself, and took the lift, ignoring the other three. And contrary to Saitama's expectations of having to not deal with this, they walked into the lift with him.

 _"Maybe they just want to take the lift, too."_ Saitama though, trying to think positively, ignoring the other 3 large men in the rather-small elevator.

"Hey, we know we just met you earlier, but..." One of them, wearing a leather jacket with a scraggly beard and sunglasses asked.

" _Please no please no please no"_ Saitama mentally yelled, as he was actually running slightly late, but as usual, it didn't go his way.

"Can you strip down to just your underwear and leave us everything you have?" The three men took out switchblades.

"Of course things wouldn't go my way. Screw this." Saitama said, rolling up his sleeves.

 **[30 seconds later...]**

Saitama walked out of the elevator, correcting his tie. In the elevator were the broken figures of the three men. The switchblades were all crumpled into nothing, and a couple of their bones were broken.

"Shit. Might need to run on my own to make it..." Saitama said to himself, sighing.

 **{City A, right in front of Saitama's workplace...}**

It was one of the biggest buildings in the city. That was quite something, considering they were in the biggest and busiest cities, City A. The only building bigger than this one was the Heroes Association HQ, which towered over every other building in sight. Even this massive building looked only 3/4 the size of the Heroes Association HQ.

The atmosphere was all normal, with everyday clerks going to work, stores opening for business, and just a general, normal feeling of the average Monday. Well, 10 seconds later, the feeling was blown away by a massive gust of wind that blew into the area, so strong that it almost uprooted the trees. Not to mention it even managed to blow away small animals, and it even shifted cars from their position. Nothing needed to be said about the other people.

"Phew. I made it." Saitama said nonchalantly, and walked into the building.

As the people helped each other up, someone asked,

"T-that was just part of a movie, right? That was some filming or a movie, and no one really ran so fast like that, right?"

 **{Saitama's cubicle...}**

On Saitama's desk, there were some assignments given by Awada. Like he said a week ago, it was a group project.

"Let's see... I'm working with Soba, Yona, and... Awada? Huh, is he helping out, or is he working with us?" He asked himself.

"Whatever. I'll go and find everyone, first." Saitama said, shaking out the train of thought.

 **{Soba's cubicle...}**

"Huh? A group project? Oh, right. Awada did say something about that last week, didn't he?" Soba said. "Well, let's go find everyone else. Speaking of which, who else are we working with?"

"Well, there's me, Awada-"

"Awada? You mean the boss is helping us out?" Soba inquired.

"I dunno. Still not sure about that. And then there's Yona."

"Yona? We have a new employee named Yona?"

"Yeah, no."

"Dammit."

"I can already imagine the trouble she'll cause... Meh, whatever." Saitama sighed in resignation, knowing the troubles ahead.

"Whatever!? What do you mean, 'whatever'!? You know how many problems she can cause from her clumsiness!?"

"Aren't we used to that by now?"

"You're right, you're right. Well, let's go find them, then."

 **{The lounge...}**

"Yona!" Saitama called out to Yona, whom was drinking juice at the dispenser.

"Oh, Saitama!" She responded, walking towards them, before tripping on her own foot.

Soba and Saitama were used to this kind of thing already, and helped her up.

"Ugh... why do I keep tripping!?" She yelled to herself in anger.

"Yeah. Anyway, there's a group project with me, Soba, you, and also boss Awada. Just calling you so we can discuss this further." Saitama said, holding up the folder.

 **{Awada's Office...}**

"Huh, where's bossman?" Soba asked. In his office, Awada was nowhere to be found.

"Strange. He's usually never anywhere but his office. Maybe he went to the toilet?" Yona asked.

"Let's just wait here, then..." Saitama said, taking a seat.

"Hey, Saitama, aren't you being a bit too comfortable?" Soba asked. Saitama was treating Awada's office like his own house. Mostly cause Saitama took a juice carton straight from Awada's private refrigerator, under his desk. And he also sat in Awada's chair.

"Well, for one, he doesn't mind. Secondly, he owes me a few, so something like this is nothing." Saitama responded. "Not to mention he usually always hands me a juice-carton every Monday, no matter the occasion, so I'm just taking it on my own."

"Still, aren't you way too lax in his office? What if he gets mad?" Soba asked.

"Please. It's like you're saying that a stick of cotton candy can get mad. And even if he does, I'll just make him kneel." Saitama nonchalantly responded.

"...Kneel?" Yona asked.

"We should find out what the group project is about, anyway." Saitama responded, dodging the question.

"Well, it says we're to suggest ways to improve customer satisfaction as well as collect information about the latest success of our products." Soba said, reading the paper in the file that Saitama gave to him.

"Which products?" Saitama asked.

Soba and Yona both tsukkomi-ed.

"You work for our company for two years! And you don't know what are our products!?" Soba asked incredulously.

"That's right! Even I know what our products are! It's literally what our company sells!" Yona rebuked.

"Clothing!" "Automobiles!"

"Eh?" Soba and Yona looked at each other puzzled.

"That's not right, I remember clearly that we're a clothing company! Just last week before the attack, I was handing in the sales reports of our branded clothing!" Soba said.

"But the week before as well, I was to inform our car designers to utilize less aluminium in their development!" Yona responded.

"Wait, we're a conglomerate though? We have subsidiaries for practically everything. That's why I was asking which products were we working on?" Saitama answered. "Really? You say I don't know our products yet you yourself didn't even know that we're a conglomerate?" Saitama asked.

"Uhh..." Both Soba and Yona sweat-dropped. Did they, who were employees to their company roughly around 2 years, didn't know about this?

"Just- *sigh* give me the damn report." Saitama said, snatching the file.

"Work on our products... collect information... customer satisfaction... etc, etc," Saitama said while skimming through the reports.

"What are you guys doing in my office?" A familiar bubbly voice sounded out from behind them.

"Oh, boss Awada! We were here to ask about the new group-project we're working on. Are you really working with us?" Soba asked.

"Ah, well I guess you could say that. I'll be helping if I can but mainly I'll be there as a 'supervisor' of sorts." Awada responded.

"That makes sense. Also, I didn't know we had a subsidiary for pharmaceuticals?" Saitama said, looking up form the report.

"Hmm? Pharmaceuticals? We do have one for that, but weren't we to work with security systems?" Awada asked.

"Oh, yeah. We're working with security systems. I'm just asking. I never knew there was one." Saitama said, holding up list of subsidiaries which were conveniently placed together with the folder.

"That's convenient. Also, that's a lot of subsidiaries." Soba said in response to the massive amount of subsidiaries on the list. The font was size 3, and the paper was A4. Even so, the paper was almost entirely filled with the names of the subsidiary companies.

"Well, anyway, let's get started." Saitama said, getting straight to the point.

"That's true. so anyway, the first thing we need is to get to the security systems subsidiary company. The building should be in City G, If I'm not wrong." Awada said.

"Alright." Saitama said, and walked away from them.

"Yeah... wait, now!?" Soba asked.

"Eh? Saitama, not now! Well, we can actually, since it's any time we want to. But right now?" Awada said.

"Hmm? Does it matter? Let's get this over with." Saitama turned around to say, and continued walking.

"B-but Saitama, Saitama! Wait up!" Yona wanted to say something, but then seeing as Saitama was just walking away, she chased after him.

"H-hey, wait up!" Soba said, chasing after the two.

"Wait for me!" Awada said, after realizing he had been left behind, and chased after them.

 **[10 minutes later...]**

"Why are you guys sweating?" Saitama asked quizzically.

"Because you *pant* ran all the way from City A to *wheeze* City G, that's what!" Soba said, panting. "Not to mention I had to carry Awada the whole way!" Soba complained about the unconscious figure he was carrying, and it was their beloved bubbly boss, Awada.

"Jeez... You're not *pant* any better..." Yona said, just catching up to them. "Soba, you're pretty fit, aren't you?!" She complained.

"Eh? Where'd you get that?" Soba asked.

"THE FACT THAT SAITAMA WAS RUNNING AT BASICALLY HALF THE SPEED OF SOUND, YET YOU STARTED RUNNING AFTER HIM AT ALMOST THE SAME SPEED!" Yona yelled out, before collapsing from exhaustion.

"Wow. She actually strained herself until she passed out, like Awada." Soba noted.

"Was I really running that fast?" Saitama asked.

"Well, not before that. We were just chatting about how we were going to go there, but the moment when we exited the building, you started running so fast we could feel wind blowing us back. I started to run after you, but I never managed to catch up." Soba replied. "And halfway, Awada collapsed from exhaustion, so I had to run back and pick him up."

"Huh, ain't that something. You managed to catch up to me." Saitama replied.

"Yeah, even so, I'm still tired after running that fast for that long. How are you not breaking a sweat!?" Soba asked.

"Why should I? I wasn't even running at full speed. I ran that slow just so you guys wouldn't lose me." Saitama replied nonchalantly. "Well, let's go in."

Soba looked at Saitama whom was just correcting his tie, and walked into the building like he didn't just run across cities within 10 minutes. "Saitama... what the hell kind of strength do you have?" He said, as he carried both Awada and Yona's unconscious form into the building after Saitama.

 **{Inside the building...}**

"And you four must be the work group from the main company?" A receptionist asked Saitama.

"Yep. We're them." Saitama responded simply without much thought.

"And why are..." She pointed at the two unconscious figures being carried by Soba.

"Oh, they passed out halfway." Soba answered for Saitama.

"So yeah. Anyway, what's the plan?" Saitama asked.

"Oh, we're to introduce ourselves, make some reports, etc, etc..." Soba said, putting the two unconscious bodies on a couch and reading the report.

"Hmm, okay then. So let's go and-" Saitama said, but then-

 **{Genus's location...}**

"Sigh... keeping up appearances really is annoying." Genus said, straightening his tie. His evolutionary projects were not only time-consuming, but required massive amounts of funding. Even keeping the main laboratory on per annum would cost over 100 million yen. That wasn't even including everything from keeping the government quiet, keeping the Heroes Association quiet (as they were a separate entity from the government altogether), bribing officials to part with death-row inmates as test subjects, etc, etc.

Needless to say, it required a hell of a lot of money. And when funds started to run dry, he had no choice but to venture into the world of business. It was completely different from biology and mathematics, which followed a set of rules, whereas business was a wild beast, untameble and unknowable. Even the most well-thought strategy could fall apart at any moment, and the best of plans could be rendered useless in just as much as a single day. Even the rough seas looked calm compared to the volatility of the markets.

But with the help of his genius intellect, he quickly dominated the business sectors as a pharmaceutical company in the beginning, and later on grew to be the biggest groups of all time. The Meliorem Group.

He wasn't all that creative when it came to names.

"I must've inherited that from mother... oh well." Genus said, washing his hands and correcting his hair. He had to ensure that he was void of imperfections all the time whenever he was visiting every company, to keep up his image as the chairman of one of the biggest conglomerations in the world.

Under the guise of the successor of his previous self before he regained his vigor and youth, he led his entire conglomeration with an iron fist. From the past 60 years, he was known as Chairman Genus. When he had regained his youth, he faked his death, and to the others in the board of directors, he was known as Genus the Second. Well, it wasn't really false. In a sense, he was 'reborn'.

In the beginning, the others looked down upon him, but after proving his prowess in the field of business, they learnt to revere him, even more so than before he was rejuvenated. But when he discovered making clones, he seldom ever came in person.

Usually, he'd just send a clone to check on the progress. But then seeing as the last time he did that, the clone was almost busted, so he decided to go in person for the first time in a couple years. Growing the company took some time, needless to say. And he definitely had to go in person, before he discovered his breakthrough in cloning.

"Sir, we're to meet with the Board of Directors after this last visit, and then it'll be lunch with Mr Narinki of the Heroes Association." Genus's loyal secretary, Riso reminded. Despite being one of the closest aides of Genus, even she didn't know of his 'secret projects'.

No one but he and his clones knew of this. Even the officials and members of the Heroes Association and the government didn't know the reason of why over 50 billion yen of the funds earned by the conglomeration and the death-row inmates were for. Other than 'a personal project', they knew nothing. Money was one of the best ways of sealing the lips of others, and one of if not the best method of killing curiosity.

"Good. I tire of visiting our company buildings, just to exchange a few words for 15 minutes to just one person." Genus sighed.

"Despite that, it is necessary to visit the acting presidents of each company at least once a month to check in on them, to ensure that-"

"Yes, yes. I understand." Genus interrupted Riso. She was a diligent, hardworking and perfect secretary. Her face wasn't one to scoff at, too. She could pass as an idol or model if she wanted to. Everyone else in the Board Of Directors envied Genus for his skills, power and his position as Chairman, but mostly, it was Riso. But Genus knew one thing.

She was too perfect. Whenever she did anything, it was done to the point of absolute perfection, seemingly being made by a robot. It creeped Genus out, honestly. He had suspicions, at first, but when he realized that she served him coffee at the same time every day, at the same temperature, and the same brand of coffee every day... and at the exact same temperature, to the finest detail?

That wasn't all. Her schedule was the same. All the time. He even secretly deployed cameras to spy on her daily activities at work, and she does the same thing every week, no matter what it was. She reads the same book at the same time, finishes reading at the same time, drank the same brand of tea on her break... you get it. It was as if she was completely mechanical.

Genus even wanted to investigate what she does at her own home, but his morals and ethics stopped him. Unless his clones were the ones doing the installation, everyone else'd just think of him as a creep, if he were to ask to install cameras secretly in his own secretary's home.

" _Sigh... well, then again, it is expected of these apes to think that I am one to be controlled by mere looks and mating instincts. I'm Genus, the 'Greatest Genius of the 30th Century', dammit. I don't care how people look or act. I only care for results."_ Genus thought to himself. " _But I must admit, she doesn't look half-bad. She could give Mosquito-Girl a run for her money."_

 _"Besides, it's a bit much to take it that far, just because your secretary does things too perfectly."_ Genus thought, as he looked at his watch. It was 15 minutes to 11 (10:45), so after this, he'd meet with the Board of Directors, and then have lunch with a Heroes Association Executive, and then he'd be free to go back to the laboratory.

"Let's go, then." Genus said, entering the lift.

"Sir, you seem to be in a rush today. Is something the matter?" Riso inquired.

" _Huh, it's not everyday that Riso says anything apart from 'would you like some coffee' or 'the next appointment is at 10 o' clock'."_ Genus though. "Well, I have things to do after this, so I'd like to get this over with as soon as possible." Genus answered.

After discovering that Mosquito-Girl was not only defeated with such apparent ease, the person who did it looked like your average Joe with no defining features. A simple chop to the neck, and Mosquito-Girl was out cold. And the fact that he looked like one of your everyday average salesman or clerk, it wasn't easy to try and track him down.

" _That old man is also interesting... at first glance he seemed like an ordinary man, but one thing's for sure... he isn't."_ Genus thought. After some investigations here and there, it was found out that the old man was a landlord in a building in City Z. He served in the military, and used to run a Takoyaki shop. Nothing out of the ordinary. But there were many anomalies about him.

First off, was that his certification was 2908, over 150 years old. Despite so, he looked like a healthy 60-year old. And at that time, he seemed like an average 30-year old when he first got his certification. So if he was really only 30 at the time, that would mean he was over 180 years old. And there were also reports about him being in two places at once.

29, February, 2965, he was caught in a large tanker explosion, and was a survivor. At the same time, a terrorist attack happened 6 cities away, and he was also reported as someone from that time. He was also one of the hostages. Not to mention he was also the one who managed to neutralize 3 of the 8 terrorists, buying time for police to rescue them and take the remaining 5 terrorists down.

" _Unexplained teleportation, or cloning, coupled with unexplained longevity. Unless he is a genius like me who knows cloning and knows how to rejuvenate himself through cell-regeneration, he would be something of a mysterious being, as no one has ever lived past 136 years, record held by a Jumyo Choju from City L."_ Genus recited the reports on the old man. Anyone else who claimed to be older than that were either fakes, or were actually mysterious beings in disguise.

There were also reports on mysterious beings able to take the shape of a humanoid, and even better, morph into a human themselves, who knows, this old man may be one of them.

" _But the most important, is that man whom defeated Mosquito-Girl instantly. She ranks within one of the top 5 fighters in the House Of Evolution, and when she transforms after having enough blood, she can easily surpass Cyborg Gorilla, ranking as the top 3rd fighter. Only Beast King in his transformed state can defeat her, and nothing needs to be said of Carnage Kabuto. He's 1st in fighting power by a large margin for a reason."_

 _"If I can gain this man, I may be able to improve our efforts five-fold in the research of the perfect body. Perfect intellect is already completed, we just need a body suited for such genius. And when it's done, I can finally improve all of us, all of humanity, into a new era! A world perfect for me, a world-"_

"Sir, we've arrived at the lobby." Riso interrupted Genus's monologue.

"A-ah. Right..." Genus said, slightly embarrassed. He was caught day-dreaming in a lift by his secretary, no less.

"Well, let's go then-" Genus said, until-

The eyes of The Strongest Office Clerk and The Obsessive Chairman met.

* * *

 **Chapter 3 is completed! Let me know about your feedback about this chapter. Also, there's more information below:**

 **1) Meliorem means 'improve' in Latin. I am not a very creative person when it comes to names.**

 **2) Saitama got his job 52.1428571429 weeks after he started training.**

 **3) My update schedule is exactly the 1st and 10th of every month regardless of what day it is. Yes, I am giving myself an actual schedule to follow since I suck at following through if I had my way. And you readers will know when I update my stories.**


	4. Chapter 4: The Obsessive Chairman (II)

**Chapter 4: The Obsessive Chairman (II)**

* * *

"...Sir?" Genus was stirred back to reality by the call of his secretary.

"Oh, nothing. Let's go." Genus said as calmly as he could. But that was quite the feat, considering his heart beat the fastest it had ever been in his 100~ years of life. Whom he was trying to find to which no avail, was right in front of him.

" _Well, I suppose the old saying 'when you do not chase it, it comes to you' applies here. Fruitless attempts to find who he is due to the utter lack of defining features, yet to encounter him so soon after simply thinking about him."_ Genus thought. Sure, he tried finding where the old man lived, to possibly gain information on whom this person was. Yet the moment he tried to send a task force compromised of only his clones, they couldn't even gain a smidgen of knowledge about them.

The old man had records. But they were old. Over a hundred years. He was presumed dead after he was reported to be a passenger on a flight which disappeared, but Genus knew that the old man was one and the same. The eyewitness reports were also confirmed, but soon after, they strangely couldn't remember much about it. All they knew was, an old man was there at the scene, having the exact same description.

Trying to find the main subject independently was like trying to find a specific piece of hay in a haystack. Not even a needle, since when in contact with it, it could be easily recognizable due to the difference between the hay and the needle, but not this one. Everything about him screamed average. Nothing made him special, nothing at all. It was like trying to find someone with only the information 'his hair is black and slightly spiky'.

" _Calm down. I can't panic and show others my anxiety, and worse, possibly alarm this person. If he escapes, who knows how much longer it'll take to track him down."_ Genus thought, slowly calming himself from the initial excitement.

"Hm- Oh, Chairman!" The receptionist just only noticed Genus, and quickly bowed to him.

"The Chairman?" Soba asked, before turning to notice the presence of Genus. "What the- Saitama, bow!" Soba said, pulling Saitama into a bow.

Saitama, not knowing who they were bowing to, raised his head a little, and then saw that face. The face of the man whom ran the entire conglomeration as their head.

"... _Ah. So that's why Soba wanted me to bow."_ Saitama thought. They were right in front of the 3rd most powerful man on earth, their Chairman, Genus. The 1st was Agoni, whom was the founder of the Heroes Association.

"It's fine, no need to bow." Genus said, waving his hand. The two of them then stopped bowing.

" _Looks like he's an employee from here. Good, that makes things easier."_ Genus thought, calming down. From his information, all his employees practically rever him, so this would make things easier. At least, he should respect him, as he was their conglomerate's Chairman.

"And you are an employee here?" Genus asked.

"Oh, no. We're from the parent company in City A. We were here for a group project." Soba answered.

"I see..." Genus answered. _"The main company? That's even better."_ Genus thought. Not only was his office there, he needed to get there anyway for the meeting with the Board of Directors.

"I-is there anything you need, sir?" Soba asked.

"Not really, no. I simply need to... borrow your friend here, for a bit." Genus said, looking at Saitama.

"Who, me?" Saitama said, pointing to himself, confirming whether or not he heard that right.

"Yes, you. If you're busy, however, I'll come find you later." Genus said.

"A-ah, no, no! We aren't at all! We're completely free! Aren't we, Saitama?" Soba said nervously, elbowing Saitama.

"Um... yeah. I'm free." Saitama said.

"Good. Come with me." Genus said.

"Sir, we're running slightly late. Are you sure-" Riso wanted to say, but then Genus interrupted her.

"It's fine. He can just follow us." Genus then looked towards Soba, and asked, "Will this be inconvenient for your group project?"

"U-uh, no, no! This will be perfectly fine! Have a nice day, sir!" Soba said, bowing at a 90 degree angle.

"Hm. Alright then. Follow me, if you will." Genus said, looking at Saitama.

"Uh, okay, sure." Saitama said, agreeing since he was still unsure what was happening.

" _Wait. Hold on, let's check what just happened, in case I'm going crazy like the old man. Okay... one, this is the Chairman of the entire conglomeration. Second, he wanted to 'borrow' me for a second, so he needs me. Hmm... yep, I'm going crazy."_ Saitama said internally.

Despite that, Saitama silently followed Genus as they walked out the building, and Saitama even sat in the same limousine as Genus.

 **[20 minutes later, In the Limousine...}**

"...So, you should be wondering why I wanted to borrow you for a little while?" Genus asked, to which Saitama secretly heaved a sigh of relief, since the silence was only further adding to the tension he was feeling. In fact, he felt bad for bringing in his perfectly clean shoes- into this spotless and probably- no, DEFINITELY overpriced limousine. The inside was made almost entirely of gold and marble, and Saitama could see some wine in the cooler. The year of the wine was 2889. Nearly 2 centuries old. On the designer-coffee table? Some snacks. and if not for that one documentary, Saitama would've never realized that those mini-black pearls weren't the same as bubble-tea tapioca balls. Those were caviar.

In short, Saitama now knew how it felt for the country mouse when he visited the city mouse. _"Hopefully the 'cat' from the story doesn't turn out to be super-intimidating business moguls which could end my career entirely in a sneeze..."_ Saitama thought. "Umm, yes. I was wondering about that for a while now..." Saitama responded to Genus's question.

"In short, you have something which interests me. But that can wait. I need to conduct a meeting with the Board of Directors for a while." Genus said. They had arrived back at the main building.

"Riso, bring him to my office and accompany him for the time being. I'll find the both of you later after this meeting." Genus said, getting off the limousine. Riso and Saitama followed suit.

 **{Genus's Office...}  
**

 _"So THIS, is the Chairman's office?"_ Saitama mentally said, entering what was not an office, but rather more like an entire apartment suite. Everything there screamed 'expensive', with the exception of a small room being separated from the rest of the floor. Presumably Riso's quarters. And I say quarters because not only was there a bed included, there were showers, and a small reading room.

" _Hmm, maybe they need to stay here for long periods of time like for all-nighters?"_ Saitama asked himself. Then he noticed a pool table and a massive flat-screen TV. " _...Probably not, then."_ He answered himself.

"So... now what?" Saitama said, breaking the silence early. He didn't want the same thing to happen in the limousine, 9 and a half minutes of awkward staring and 30 seconds of conversation.

"Wait until Mr Genus finishes with his monthly meeting with the Board of Directors." Riso responded monotonously.

"Huh, must be tiring, needing to be his secretary and everything. Seems like it should be exhausting, needing to help out with one of the world's most powerful men." Saitama said, attempting to hold a conversation.

"Normally, yes. But after doing it many times, it's just another day for me." Riso responded with a simple answer.

"Is there anything out of the ordinary that happens every now and then?" Saitama asked.

"Well, no. Everything usually goes to plan. The only interruption would be something completely unexpected, like say, a riot or an assassination attempt." Riso answered.

"Assassination attempts?" Satiama asked.

"Well, it's just an example. There was one case, but it never happened, since it was stopped beforehand by security. And no, they don't happen frequently. Now if you'll excuse me..." Riso answered, seemingly bored, and then she walked to her quarters, and took a book from her bookshelf. She then sat down on her desk, and started reading. It wasn't obvious, nor was it expressed, but the meaning behind it was clear; 'This conversation is over'.

" _Well isn't she the pleasant one? Chatty and sociable, as well."_ Saitama sarcastically thought to himself. " _Well, I guess I'll just take a seat and wait."_ Saitama then sat on the sofa- made of white-tiger fur, and proceeded to do... nothing, and wait.

 **[30 minutes later, The Top Floor...}**

"So other than that, nothing else to report?" Genus asked the other directors.

A rather plump and round man whom was wearing a grey suit and checkered tie laughed jovially, as he answered in a booming voice, "Ah, Mr Genus... under your leadership, nothing can go wrong! But even without you around for much, it doesn't mean we can't keep it running! You may have been his successor, but we've known him for far longer. Genus the 1st was your age when he founded the company! I was one of his first supporters!"

"You can rest easy. The only 'problem', is having 'too much money to splash around'!" He answered joyfully. The majority of the other directors laughed along.

"I can tell. But as Chairman, whether we are deep in debts or swimming in cash, it is my responsibility and duty to take care of it. No detail must escape my sight. Even the smallest of slips can lead to devastation." Genus answered strictly.

"Ah, you take after your father. Still, we aren't blind to that. We're businessmen! We know what to do. And to answer your question, nothing else to report for today." The plump man answered.

"If that is so, I'll take my leave." Genus said, getting up from his chair, and leaving the meeting room... to go one floor lower, his office.

 **{Genus's Office...}**

"I'm back. Saitama, I hope I didn't make you wait long." Genus said to Saitama as he spotted him on he couch as soon as he entered.

"Alright. By the way, I don't recall giving you my name yet?" Saitama asked.

"Oh, since you said you worked here, I simply checked your files. Your name wasn't exactly hard to find." Genus answered.

"Okay... So do you need me for something?" Saitama asked the question that was on his mind for some time, " _What does he need me for?"_ At that question, Riso looked up from her book, as well. Even she did not know why Genus would want to bother meeting an everyday employee.

"I'll tell you afterwards. I hope you'll be fine with waiting another hour or so." Genus said.

"It's okay. I can wait." Saitama replied.

"Good. Let's go. Also, Riso, there's no need to accompany me after this, since I need you to be here in case anything happens." Genus said to Riso.

"Of course, sir." Riso replied with a curt bow after getting up from her chair.

"Saitama, follow me." Genus said to Saitama, whom simply followed along.

 _"Let us test... your true power."_ Genus thought to himself.

 **{In a fancy restaurant...}**

"What? He had some things that came up last minute?" Narinki asked the waiter.

"Y-yes... He said it was urgent, and he apologizes for this..." The waiter responded.

"It's fine. I guess I'll just have lunch here then! Waiter! Bring me the ten most expensive dishes in your restaurant!"

"H-huh? The ten most expensive? Do you mean one of the ten most expensive dishes in our restaurant, or ten of the most expensive dish?" The waiter asked for conformation.

"One of each of the ten most expensive dishes in the restaurant! I just said that!" Narinki yelled.

"O-O-Of course! Right away, sir!" The waiter said, practically running to the kitchen.

 **[50 minutes later, Off-road...}**

"So... where are we going?" Saitama asked. He had been waiting in the limousine for over 50 minutes. It was far. Very far. Well, sure. He didn't bore himself like last time, and instead was offered multiple snacks by Genus, which he would never have dreamt of ever being able to afford. Just one of those caviar-on-bread would've cost him... almost a full month of rent.

"Ah, we're going to my laboratory." Genus replied.

"Laboratory?" Saitama asked.

"Oh, you see, I wanted to make sure no one would overhear us. I know of your strength." Genus replied.

"Huh? When? I usually never reveal it in public unless there's a monster nearby." Saitama asked once more.

"You know that mosquito-lady that attacked City-Z a week ago?" Genus asked.

"Yes, why?"

"She was sent by my organization."

A silence ensued.

"...So she's a coworker of mine?"

Genus mentally face-palmed.

"No. She's a part of my other organization."

"Ah... and what does this have to do with me?"

" _He's not the brightest of people, is he?"_ Genus said to himself.

"I'm interested in your body." Genus said finally.

A look of shock was on Saitama's face, before he replied swiftly, "I don't swing that way, sorry."

At this time Genus had actually face-palmed.

"God, do you not know what my other organization does? It's a laboratory which manipulates genes for evolution! I am interested in what makes your body so strong!" Genus said, practically yelling in annoyance.

"Oh..." Saitama responded. _"Shit, I think I made him angry. Better stay quiet for now."_

Genus then heaved a loud sigh, as he combed his hair back. "You don't know much about genetic engineering, do you?"

"Uhh... 64, 61 and 3?" Saitama said some random numbers, in hopes that in that one small infinitesimal chance, he was right.

"I'm going to assume you somehow managed to correctly guess all possible permutations of codons in DNA, the amount that represents amino acids, and stop signals, and say, no. No you don't. Well, not like I expected you to know about it anyway." Genus said, grabbing a drink. "I just want you as a test subject. Nothing more, nothing less."

"Oh... alright. That won't take long, right?" Saitama asked.

"Well... It may take between an hour to a month. Genetic engineering is very, very volatile. Sometimes the splicing is alright, and it improves your bodily functions, and sometimes it removes a very important gene and you end up dead, at best. Either that or a monstrous horrifying mass of mutated flesh."

"...I'm not going to undergo that, am I?"

"Well, no. Not for now. Oh, I'll pay you for every day you're here as a test subject, and every experimentation on you will also have you get paid. You are also not forced, as you can leave at any time." Genus answered.

"How much?" Saitama asked, clearly interested.

"500,000 yen a day, and experimentation will give you 250,000,000 yen every session." Genus said.

"Well let's get started then." Saitama said, completely fired up. Money, was something Saitama would love to have. And the mutations... he'd rather not.

Splendid. Oh, we're here." Genus said, looking out the limousine window.

Saitama then looked out the window, and there was a building. It was strangely distorted, though. As if it was made of water and was sloshing around in a weird container. The colors were also strange, as they mainly composed of green, blue and yellow. Also, the surrounding area in a large sphere was also colored the same.

"Why's the building so weirdly colored?" Saitama commented.

"I-impressive... So you managed to see it?" Genus asked.

"Um... yes. Why? It's colored strange, though." Saitama answered.

"To see through the light refraction cloaking and photon interrupters... seems like there's still more that meets the eye abot you, Saitama." Genus said, fixing his spectacles.

 _"I probably shouldn't have done that. I probably should've stayed quiet. Now he might ask to dig out my eyes."_ Saitama thought to himself. Then again, as Genus seemed less and less like a businessman and more and more like a mad doctor, he had every right to think that. Not to mention that crazy-mosquito-girl whom Saitama first thought to be some cosplayer who went too far was actually biologically like that, flesh and all.

 **{In the basement, a large testing room...}**

"So this is that man?" a clone of Genus's asked, from the other side of a glass window.

"Yes. The facial features are completely the same, and not to mention he managed to see through the cloaking of the whole building." Genus answered his clone.

"See through the cloaking?" "That's amazing!" "But is he really the same?" "He could be a twin brother or something..." "That's true, but what're the odds?" His clones coversed.

"It's fine. Even if he isn't the same, at least his eyes themselves are something amazing. Even thermal sensing can't detect the building, which has nothing to do with his vision, but still, let's test out his skills." Genus said, pressing a button.

"They've also been notified not to kill him. And the same has been informed to Mr Saitama himself." Genus explained.

In the testing room, a door opened to reveal 6 humanoid beings. One looked like a slug, another a frog, and then a praying-mantis. Following that was someone Saitama had met before, Mosquito-Girl. After that was a metallic-armored being which was covered in so many armor plates Satiama couldn't tell what animal this was based off. Only when Saitama saw that the posture was strange and looked like a gorilla, only then did Saitama notice it WAS a gorilla, since on one metal-plate there was a stamp which read 'Armored-Gorilla-MKII'.

Beside the gorilla, and the biggest of them all, was lion-like being which wore a black shirt seemingly made of animal furs, and a leopard-skin cloth around his waist. He also had large bracelets on both his wrists and ankles, and a large belt with a lion-head on it, which was supported by chains.

"Remember, I don't want any deaths. No killing whatsoever, and you subjects, if you kill him, I will personally oversee your executions, all of you, while I flood the entire chamber with Carbon Monoxide. And if that doesn't do it, I'll flood in Sulfuric Acid to ensure none of you are leaving alive. Oh, and Saitama, if you end up killing them... well, it's just an accident. I'll just have to cut your pay." Genus said over the intercom.

"Well isn't that somewhat biased?" Kamakyuri said sarcastically.

"It doesn't matter. Remember, everyone in order, and finally, everyone will attack Saitama all at once." Genus said. "Is that alright with you, Saitama?"

"That's fine. I mean, I was expecting needing blood samples or whatever. A fight? This'll be easy." Saitama said.

"Oh, well aren't you the confident one?" Beast King said disdainfully. He didn't even put him in his eyes.

"It doesn't matter. Let's go, then." Saitama said.

"By the way, the more efficiently you dispatch them, the more you get paid. Think of it as a bonus." Genus said through the intercom once more. "Also, same thing applies to the rest of you. If you manage to defeat him, I'll grant you one request. As long as it doesn't cost too much. And as long as it isn't too hard to obtain, either. And no, I'm not granting you people to kill or test out your skills against, Beast King. Your blood-lust is uncontrollable as is."

"Tch, well that's unfair." Beast King snorted.

"Well, I'm up first. I'm actually pretty weak compared to everyone else, so please go easy one me." Slugerous raised his hand, as he introduced himself.

"Alright then." Saitama simply said, as he took off his tie and jacket and folded them nicely. The two of them then headed for the center of the room where they would spar.

" _Okay... I've done this before. Remember. Give him a splitting headache to confuse him, and then place him in a chokehold. I may be one of the scouts, but I'll show I'm not that much of a pushover! I'll show them-"_ Slugerous's thought process was then interrupted by a punch to his gut that knocked him out cold.

"Eww. I definitely expected this, but gross..." Saitama said, looking at his black military-gloved fist which was covered in slime.

"He moves fast." Armored Gorilla commented.

"Yes. And he didn't actually punch, either. He just placed his fist in that position before moving." Beast King also commented. Then there was a smile on his face. "Well, he's not a pushover, at least."

"Also, where'd he get those gloves?" Kamakyuri asked.

"Oh, I usually keep these military-gloves just in case I need to kill something and the blood goes all over the place. Blood and guts on your hands aren't pleasant." Saitama responded.

"Huh, he heard me from quite far away. Well, it's nothing that he heard it, but rather it's impressive that he managed to hear enough of my sentence." Kamakyuri added.

"Well, I'm up." Frog-Man said, walking towards Saitama.

As he arrived within 3 meters of Saitama, he unsheathed his tanto which glistened strangely. Normal blades were grey-ish or silver in color. Metallic in general. His tanto was spotted with a sheen of green and a hue of blue. (Intentional rhyming which took like 30 minutes to think up)

"You're pretty nice, waiting for me to unsheathe my blade." Frog-Man said, taking a basic sword stance.

"Well, it seemed like a jerk to attack someone before they're even ready. Also that guy was because he was covered in slime. I know he's a slug, but I'd like to not get dirty. That's the main reason I took off my tie and my suit's jacket.

"Well, my sword's covered in a poison I secreted myself through my hands, which is over 20 times more toxic than a poison-dart-frog's poison." Frog-Man said, shaking his blade a little which dripped some of the poison onto the floor.

"Here I come!" Frog-Man said, rushing towards Saitama and as it looked like the blade was about to hit him, the vision of Frog-Man grew dim, and then, dark.

"He dodged with minimal effort. Is he a martial artist or something?" Kamakyuri asked.

"Who knows. Also, he didn't punch this time, either. He just let the momentum of Frog-Man do the work." Beast-Man commented. "Is it Aikido?"

"Oh, yeah. Everyone in the company gets free self-defense lessons as some benefits. I just asked for something which required the least amount of work, and then they suggested Aikido. It's not really combat, but it's helpful for avoiding attacks and... well, controlling my strength overall." Saitama replied.

"Hmm. You may have taken the two of them down, but they're the weakest of us! Now, you'll be fighting on of the actual combat-ready ones! Me!" Kamakyuri said, readying his claws.

"Okay. And since you're not slimy or anything, the gloves aren't necessary." Saitama said, taking off his gloves. But halfway, Kamakyuri took the initiative to attack first, clawing horizontally. Saitama stepped back with minimal effort, just barely dodging the claw.

"Tch! My surprise attack had no effect!" Kamakyuri said angrily.

"Aikido often teaches about being wary against surprise attacks, so that's-" And Saitama was cut short by another swing of Kamakyuri's blade-arms.

"Rude. But still, thanks for closing the distance, I guess." Saitama then responded with a kick to Kamakyuri's chest, which sent him flying back. As Kamakyuri struggled to get up, he spat out greenish-blood, and passed out from the shock.

"Well, the leg muscles are one of the strongest muscles in the body, and they're 3 to 4 times stronger than arms. I guess it makes sense. Dr Genus even stated that he's no ordinary man." Armored Gorilla said, looking at Kamakyuri's unconscious body.

"Hmph. Mosquito-Girl, you're up." Beast King said, looking at Mosquito-Girl.

She silently floated to Saitama, and then, attacked with a swift rush out of nowhere.

"She's still harboring that grudge since then, huh?" Beast King said with a snort. Sure, he was a bit skeptical about how this ordinary fellow managed to down the blood-empowered Mosquito-Girl, since if she has enough blood and manages to transform, she could give him some trouble.

"You only managed to take me down because I let my guard down! If I was allowed to kill you I'd suck out every bit of your blood!" She yelled out in anger.

"Really. You'd think a former assassin would be more composed, but not her." Beast King laughed.

"A former assassin? Enlighten me, if you will." Armored Gorilla said.

"Well, you know that some of us are mutated by splicing human DNA with those of other animals, right? Well, me, Mosquito-Girl, and Carnage Kabuto were actually mutated from humans." Beast King explained.

"From what I gathered, she was a former assassin who was capable of infiltrating the most guarded of mansions and kill without leaving a trace. Sometimes she'd disguise herself, and get close to her target. A teacher, janitor, prostitute, hell, even as a student, she can disguise herself as almost any and every employment type. Sometimes she's a hot secretary. Sometimes she's a poor woman who's taken up prostitution as a means of living. Sometimes she's your average high-school student or college student."

"But after a botched job where the client ratted on her, as her anonymous client this time was her very target himself. She was then taken to a women's prison where she attempts to escape. After almost 7 times where she escaped, they were tempted into just giving her the death-sentence and be done with it, but then Dr Genus appeared like a miracle, offering to take away criminals on the death-penalty." Beast King finished.

"I see. And what of you and Carnage Kabuto?" Armored Gorilla asked.

"Well, I was a gang leader turned mob-boss, former A-Class criminal 'The Lion'. Trust me, the fact that I am now a lion is NOT a coincidence. I just joked with the doctor about 'why not just mutate me into a lion, since my nickname was already 'The Lion'?"

"...And there's how I mutated into the 2nd strongest fighter in the House Of Evolution." Beast King said, with a hint of pride.

"You don't seem disturbed at the fact you're now a large humanoid lion." Armored Gorilla stated.

"Back then my only real pursuit was power. In fact, all the pain form the mutations were worth it. This power is awesome!" Beast King then raised his fist in pride.

"I see the lion always has it's pride, huh?" Armored Gorilla joked.

"Yep. Anyway, about Carnage Kabuto..." Beast King started, then went silent.

"...That freak? What was he as a human? Did the blood-lust and apparent insanity come from his time as a human?" Armored Gorilla asked.

"Hmph. Yes. When I was in jail, he was even my cell-mate! Now, as a human, I boast about my physical strength a lot. Before I turned into a thug, I used to be the Junior-Heavyweight Champion in high-school! But all it takes is one bad night and an accidental killing, my boxing career was over."

"But you see, Carnage Kabuto was before this, just average-looking, like he didn't belong. I even wondered what he was doing in there? I was in a Maximum-Security prison where the worst of the worst ended up, only slightly behind Smelly-Lid Prison. Everyone there was either a hardened killer, or a dangerous psychopath. I never really bothered him, since even though I was a mob-boss, I never disturbed anyone who doesn't get in my way."

"During lunchtime, he'd constantly get bullied by everyone else. I mean, I never tried defending him, since we get out of each other's way. Also, the strange thing was, he smiled, even while he was bullied. When he was punched, he smiled. When he was given extra work by the guards who also took part in the bullying? He smiled. When the prisoners took his food and dumped it on his head? He smiled. And guess what, when he was practically drowned by other inmates in our cell's toilet... He. Smiled."

"I always thought that he was probably some guy who was innocent and accused of something he didn't do, which was why he smiles constantly, like he thinks, 'I'll get out one day, then I'll show these bastards!' At least, that's what I wanted to think. But on the 13th of August, more than a whole month since we first got in, I learnt why he was really here."

"Why? What happened?" Armored Gorilla asked.

"Exactly 44 days after he was first transferred there, he killed everyone who messed with him. Even the guards." Beast King said solemnly.

"How?"

"During lunch, everyone was bullying him, as usual. But at 1:11 p.m, he first killed the biggest person who was bulling him with a jab of the plastic fork straight into his eye, and right afterwards, he took it out, and started chewing the eyeball. Disgusting. Some guards took out their batons and attempted to stop him, but all they did was give him a weapon. He disarmed him by breaking a guard's hand, and after the baton was acquired, it was a straight-up slaughterfest. I was there, too. Almost 80% of the entire cafeteria was killed. He could even dodge bullets. But not after they were fired. He wasn't superhuman. At least, nothing known."

"After that, I wanted to asked why he was really there. No guard would answer, since they didn't know, either. But then, the prison warden came for a visit. He was a very friendly man, wearing a grey suit and blue tie every time he comes to visit. A psychopath. Every time he strikes up a conversation, 3 minutes in, he starts taking out a knife, and starts to sharpen it against the prison bars. No one messes with him."

"I asked him, who is this man?" Beast King then heaved a sigh.

"He replied, 'Why, the most dangerous man in the entire prison! We didn't know who we could pair him up with as a cell-mate, so the second most-dangerous person in the prison makes sense!'. I then learnt he was a total madman. Carnage Kabuto was a serial killer which would be completely nice, but those who ever did something bad to him, like a mugging or harassment, 44 days later, they were all killed."

"The worst was when he entered a Yakuza group, completely unarmed. He also came out, completely unarmed, and unharmed. But the inside was a gruesome scene. Apparently their boss had bumped into him 44 days ago and had shoved him into a puddle of dirt. That was under some eyewitness accounts. Well, the boss's body had his arms amputated, and in his stomach were traces of cyanide."

"The warden just straight up handed me this information while we were having a little chat. I even asked him, 'how strong are you'? He said he could kill 20 men in a room armed with only a knife, whereas everyone else had a gun. I then asked, 'how about him'? And pointed to Carnage Kabuto."

"His jolly and cheerful mood then turned solemn, as he silently said, 'If I could kill 20 men armed with guns as I am armed with a knife, he can kill 100 of me as I am armed with swords and guns, and he, with nothing.' After that visit he never talked to me again."

"That's quite the story, huh?" Armored Gorilla said.

"Yep. But enough about that. What's taking so long?" Beast King said, looking at the two fight. Then they realized, Saitama wasn't fighting back. He was simply dodging the claw attacks with such minimal effort it appeared as if he was phasing through them. And as time went on Mosquito-Girl's attacks became sluggish as compared to her earlier rush in the beginning.

"Not a lot of chances to practice Aikido since I don't expect to get into a fight very often, so I'm just taking my time on this one." Saitama replied. And as Mosquito-Girl's final claw attack landed on solid ground, she fell down, exhausted. All Saitama did was a light chop to her neck again, and then she was out.

"Well, then it's my turn-" Armored Gorilla wanted to say, but then was interrupted by Genus over the intercom.

"Change of plans. Everyone evacuate the room immediately. Carnage Kabuto will be coming in person."

* * *

 **Chapter 4 is finalized! (After painful amounts of re-working the entire plot-line, that is) Let me know of your comments on this chapter. Also, there's more information below.**

 **1) I will try to stick to the canon as much as possible, so there will definitely be deaths. I'm not going to go the full-pacifist wussy-writer route and leave everyone alive. But, if it makes the story more interesting and won't impact with it much, I'll try to leave them alive. As shown above.**

 **2) Saitama got his job 365 days after he started training.**

 **3) This chapter is late because I accidentally went a little too far with playing CS:GO. I usually finish writing the story late at night (I'm in Singapore currently, not native) So I decided to leave it for the next day. Meh, it's not much, after all, I am uploading this currently at (03:27) a.m, so it's something.**


	5. Chapter 5: The Obsessive Chairman (III)

**Chapter 5: The Obsessive Scientist (III)**

* * *

"WHAT!?" Beast King yelled.

"Carnage Kabuto is going to be testing him. I already told him that he must not kill Saitama. But I didn't say anything about everyone else. I would suggest all of you evacuate, but if you want to stay in there, that's your problem." Genus answered.

"We must leave the room!" Armored Gorilla said, picking up the unconscious Mosquito-Girl and Kamakyuri, and ran towards the exit. "You pick up Slugerous and Frog-Man!"

"Hell no! Law of the jungle, if they die, they die!" Beast King said running towards the exit faster than Armored Gorilla.

"They're not the best fighters but they're members of the scout team! Beast King, get your arse over here!" Armored Gorilla said in a panic, dropping his robotic voice.

" _Eh? What happened to his robotic voice? Who's this Carnage Kabuto anyways?"_ Saitama thought. He then looked towards Frog-Man and Slugerous. "Hmm... I think I can bring them over by the exit for them..."

As Beast King and Armored Gorilla reached the exit, Armored Gorilla chastised Beast King. "I understand you don't care much, but they contribute to at least 30% of all the information we gather! Not to mention they're useful for high-risk missions!"

"Who cares! As long as we live, we'll be fine! We're the main attack-force, dammit! Hey, what's he doing?" Beast King said, looking at Saitama who was waving at them.

"Is he-" Armored Gorilla said halfway.

"Alright, hopefully they'll catch them properly." Saitama said, picking up Slugerous by the arm, and swung him around so fast, he woke up.

"W-w-w-whuh!?" He managed to say through his mouth before he sped up so fast his face was deformed. Or rather his entire body. He was part-slug, after all.

"Ready, go!" Saitama said, then throwing Slugerous like a pitcher throwing a baseball. He went so fast it knocked him out again.

"Holy-" Beast King said, before getting hit in the chest by Slugerous's unconscious form, which had also knocked him unconscious.

"Here comes the next guy!" Saitama said, taking up Frog-Man by the leg, did the same thing, and threw it to Armored Gorilla, whom actually managed to catch him.

"Huh, he saved them. I guess he's nicer than you'd think. Come on, Beast King-" Armored Gorilla then turned to see that everyone besides him had been knocked unconscious.

"Ah... Shit."

"Oh, Hey Armored Gorilla. What's everyone doing there?" Ground Dragon asked, just passing by.

Back in the testing room, the door which Saitama had hurled the two unconscious beings out of had closed, and a bigger, much larger door had appeared, revealing a grotesque beetle-like being, of which the only things humanoid about it were that it had a head, and four limbs.

"Hehehehehe... so you're the one the doctor wanted me to test on? I heard you managed to beat Mosquito-Girl when she was high on blood. She's a feisty one when she has her fill of blood, I'll give her that. But even then it's easy to take her down. For me, at least." The grotesque beetle-thing said.

"I am Carnage Kabuto, the strongest of the House Of Evolution members!" He introduced.

"Strongest, huh? Well, now you've gone and gotten my hopes up. If you can take that mosquito lady down easily, you're probably not boasting about that 'strongest' thing, huh?" Saitama asked, smiling in anticipation. 'Strongest' was a word he knew all too well.

"Oh? Looks like I have a fellow 'Strongest' as well?" Carnage Kabuto asked.

"I'm not so sure about the 'strongest', but I can say I'm really strong. Too strong." Saitama said, as he smiled, and folded his sleeves. "Can you prove me wrong?"

"I get it. You're too strong among the old humans, huh? Well, I know how you feel." Carnage Kabuto nodded. "But I am far more than 'human'. Well, enough talk, wanna start?" Carnage Kabuto asked.

"Sure." And as soon as Saitama said that, the both of them clashed.

The both of them separated after a single move, with Saitama's fist smoking, and a dent in Carnage Kabuto's carapace.

"Well, isn't that some strength?" Carnage Kabuto taunted. Soon after, the both of them initiated combat.

Behind the glass window, Genus and his clones were baffled.

"He managed to crack and dent Carnage Kabuto's carapace!?" Genus said in disbelief. Testing had revealed that his carapace was not only bulletproof, it could withstand a missile without any damage nor hint of change upon it! Yet this man's simple punch had managed to deform it? It meant that not only was this man's punch contains greater impact strength than a missile from a rocket launcher, he could throw them around like ordinary punches. In fact, they WERE his ordinary punches.

"How did someone with this level of strength go under the radar? He should've at least have been noticed from his absolutely ridiculous physical strength! Or did he usually never utilize it until he needed to, or had no one ever even noticed it?" Genus asked himself. It was like having a missile launcher with infinite-ammo hacks. Even if that can't take down an average Dragon-level threat, it could threaten Demon-level threats.

"W-wait, it looks like Carnage Kabuto is losing!" A clone said, pointing out that Carnage Kabuto was on one side, panting heavily and there were many dents and cracks in his armor. Saitama on the other hand appeared unfazed.

"I was actually holding back a whole lot, you know? Not to say anything about you, but I'm kinda disappointed..." Saitama said, looking at Carnage Kabuto's exhausted form. His original excited face changed to one of dejected boredom.

"Not yet... You're pretty strong, I'll give you that. But since you pissed me off..." He said, as his body slowly grew larger and larger. Bits of his broken carapace fell off as well.

"Not good!" Genus said, before grabbing the mic and yelling into it, "Carnage Kabuto! You are not allowed to kill him! Disengage Carnage mode immediately!" The sirens in the large testing facility started blaring, and immediately after, the room changed it's color scheme from pure white to red.

The exits have automatically sealed off, and Carnage Kabuto had finished transforming into a much larger purple monstrosity.

" **(CARNAGE MODE!)** " He said out loud as he finished transforming.

"Shit! Fill the room with sleeping gas!" A clone ordered.

"No, stop! The sleeping gas we have doesn't work on Carnage Kabuto when he's in Carnage mode! Worse, it might end up affecting the specimen and he won't be able to fight a full capacity, much less fight evenly with Carnage Kabuto!" Genus stopped them.

"Well, he managed to defeat Carnage Kabuto without Carnage mode, maybe he'll manage?" A clone suggested.

"Don't you know? Carnage mode increases Carnage Kabuto's strength five-fold at least! Even if the specimen is strong, there's no way he'll defeat Carnage Kabuto while in Carnage mode!" Another clone said.

"His punches are on par with missiles! And he even said that he was holding back! Maybe we won't go so far as to say defeat Carnage Kabuto, but he should at least be in no threat of death..." A clone said, pondering.

In the testing room, Saitama dodged all of Carnage Kabuto's punches, and threw a few of his own, but this time not even scratching Carnage Kabuto's new carapace.

"Huh, it's stronger." Saitama said to himself.

"OF COURSE! WHEN I'M IN CARNAGE MODE, I GET AT LEAST 5 TIMES STRONGER, AND I'LL LOSE CONTROL FOR A WHOLE WEEK! AFTER I KILL YOU, I'LL GO INTO THE NEAREST TOWN AND SLAUGHTER UNTIL NEXT MONDAY!" Carnage Kabuto yelled while throwing a volley of strikes, all of them missing Saitama.

"Five times, huh? Okay then." Saitama stated, before proceeding to dodge all of Carnage Kabuto's incoming strikes, while getting closer.

As he approached nearer and nearer until his fist was within reach, and then he threw another punch which looked no different from his other punches, but when it landed, it cracked his armor the same way the previous punches did to Carnage Kabuto before he was in Carnage mode.

"What!? You cracked it again!?" He said, backing off a little. Even after being in Carnage mode, this man could crack his carapace the same way he did before!?

"Huh, it really is five times stronger." Saitama stated.

"Grr... TAKE THIS!" He said, screaming while rushing with twice the speed and power as before.

Dodging everything, Saitama simply did the same thing from before, and soon, it was the same thing all over again, with Carnage Kabuto running out of power due to his injuries, and Saitama simply stood there with a bored expression.

"Come on... is that really it?" Saitama said, yawning.

"No... no... NOT UNTIL I TASTE YOUR BLOOD! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"

Out of nowhere, after that sentence, he started screaming at the top of his lungs, and so loudly that the glass from the other side of the room started to crack.

"Not good! Activate the Cubic Silicon Nitride panels!" Genus ordered, and a bunch of clones scrambled to some control panels, and another transparent-window pane covered the other side of the room, and just in time, as the previously reinforced-glass had shattered into shards of glass.

The new transparent window panels were vibrating slightly, but held up fine. Saitama, while he was in the room had simply blocked his ears with his fingers.

For up to 30 seconds, Carnage Kabuto did nothing but scream, and then he stopped, and took deep breaths.

"...I've calmed down now. Let's start again." Carnage Kabuto said, his form still in Carnage mode, but he was clearly calmer than before.

"Alright." Saitama said after unclogging his ears, and the fight ensued again. Except this time, instead of just rushing blindly, Carnage Kabuto was taking the initiative to block, dodge, redirect attacks, something which shocked Genus.

"Carnage Kabuto!? Dodging and evading attacks!?" Genus said incredulously. In all his years since the creation of Carnage Kabuto, something like 'dodging' or 'guarding' was practically an incomprehensible concept to him.

But even so, slowly but surely Saitama was speeding up, making it harder to dodge the attacks until finally, one of them landed, and another, and another, until the same thing had happened again. Carnage Kabuto was slowly wounded while Saitama wasn't even fazed.

"Is he toying with him? Carnage Kabuto!?" Genus said, shocked once more. Not only was this man forcing Carnage Kabuto to be on the defensive, but also still toying with him!

" _Sigh..._ Looks like I'll have to reveal it." Carnage Kabuto said.

"Hmm? You got another transformation or something?" Saitama asked.

"Spot on. But this time... you're definitely dead." Carnage Kabuto's previously green and purple body started to grow even larger, growing beyond 18 meters in height, and his body changed from purple and green to gold and red, with a gilded white around his horn and other parts of his carapace. He also grew four extra arms, two more on each side.

" **(RAGING ASURA MODE!)** " He said the same way when he finished transforming from Carnage mode to Raging Asura mode.

After he finished transforming, he rushed towards Saitama, surprising him with a punch from all six arms.

On the other side of the window pane, Genus was utterly confused.

"We never engineered that ability into him, how'd he get that? More importantly, how did he keep that a secret from us!?" Genus asked his clones. Every single one of them were present to engineer Carnage Kabuto, so how he managed to keep that transformation a secret was strange indeed.

"We don't know, how does that transformation even work!? He grew 4 more arms in the span of just 20 seconds, a measly 10 seconds faster than transforming into Carnage mode!" A clone answered. Growing four arms was not a mean feat in any way. Some monsters were capable of immense regeneration or the ability to shape their body like clay, but Carnage Kabuto wasn't one of them!

"HYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Carnage Kabuto seems to have completely lost his reason this time, as the only thing he did was yell and rush Saitama to the point where the room they were in was too small. Like the first two times, dodging never crossed his mind.

As they reached the edge of the room, Carnage Kabuto punched Saitama so hard his figure was shot around the room, colliding with the walls, utterly decimating them in the process.

"DEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATHDEATH-" Carnage Kabuto had continuously repeated these words without stopping, truly going mad. If he managed to retain a single shred of conscience and control when he was in Carnage mode, Raging Asura mode slurped up the last bit of rational thought, leaving machine that lusted for death and death alone.

"Alright. I'm bored now." Saitama said to himself. He was done with this. Sure, he was getting paid to do these tests, but this was just getting boring. He then struck Carnage Kabuto so hard and so fast that it looked as if his hand never moved. But in that split second, Carnage Kabuto stopped moving, and he fell.

"Wait. What." Genus said, eyes wide open, mouth agape.

In the room, was Saitama with a bored expression, and a unconscious Carnage Kabuto, still in Raging Asura mode. Saitama's fist was smoking. It didn't need a genius to figure out what happened.

"I'm done. Is there anything else I need to do?" Saitama asked. "I expected something more after another transformation, but I guess I should never be too hopeful..." Saitama sighed.

"...I think... I'm done with evolution." Genus said, mouth agape, and nasal fluid dripping from his nose comically. His clones had the exact same expression, being clones and all.

"Um... hello?" Saitama asked. What Genus said hadn't been transmitted through the intercom, so Saitama was in the blank about how he had utterly changed the worldview of Genus completely.

* * *

 **[The next day...]**

"Saitama! What in the world happened!?" Soba asked. Just this morning, it had been revealed, and spread like wildfire across media, that the 3rd most powerful man in the world, Genus, had announced his early retirement, and was handing the company to be managed by his secretary Riso until he found a suitable successor, or he died, in which the company would be split among the other directors of the company.

"It's just some confidential stuff." Saitama answered.

"You kidding. So out of nowhere, he just decided to choose you for something. You have some connections I don't know about or something, Saitama?" Soba asked, still not believing a word Saitama said.

"It's the truth..." Saitama said, telling the truth. He didn't even need to lie, all he needed to say was 'it's confidential' and most people'd shut up. Not Soba, apparently.

 **[The day before, right before Saitama was sent back...}**

" _Remember, if anyone, or that one friend of yours asks, just say that it's some confidential stuff. Someone with a brain should be able to tell how important corporate secrets are. Even if not, not like they'd dig up the secrets. Trust me, I keep a very clean trail." Genus said to Saitama._

 _"Got it. But what if my boss wants to know?" Saitama asked._

 _"Repeat to him the words 'confidential', and unless he wants to lose his job, he'll oblige." Genus answered. "I may not be leading the company publicly, but I'm still leading the company in the shadows. It's useful, since potential enemies would strike when my company is at its weakest, therefore warning me about whom will plan to stage a corporate takeover."_

 _"Obviously I'm not really resigning. I still need funds. Don't worry, I'll make sure you keep your job."_

 **[The current day, in front of Soba...}**

" _I'm still keeping my job, nothing to worry about..."_ Saitama thought to himself. "Look, I really can't say, and I didn't see him after that point." Saitama said. He was annoyed that even when he said the truth, Soba didn't believe him.

"Come on, tell me, Saitama! We're friends, aren't we?" Soba coaxed. "What'd he ask you to do? What'd he need you for? Why'd he ask for you specifically?"

"No. Do you not understand the meaning of 'confidential'? Are you not afraid of losing your job or something? You might not, but I definitely do, alright? So stop asking, I'd rather have a stable income and keep a roof over my head."

"Not to mention what he needed me for was something different. After giving me that task, I didn't see him after that. His resignation has nothing to do with me, and I know nothing about it. Even if I were to reveal what I did yesterday, you wouldn't be able to get anything he did from it, and we'd lose our jobs. Horrible trade-off." Saitama persuaded.

"Hm... fine then. Still, what is he thinking? If I were him, I'd stay in that position until I die! The third most powerful man in the world!" Soba said, sighing enviously. People would often _kill_ to get that position.

"Or is it because he's afraid of assassins...?" Soba said to himself, derailing form his previous train of thought.

"Well, whatever. We should get back to work now." Saitama said.

 **[15 minutes later...]**

"Saitama..."

"No."

"Oh, come on... please?"

"No. I did not have anything to do with this. Trust me on this, Awada. And Soba told you about it yesterday, didn't he?"

"Yes... while I and Yona were knocked out, Soba said that you left just as we woke up."

"I see. Still, I know nothing about his retiring. All he handed me was a private and confidential task I can't tell anyone about. Hence the classification of 'confidential'."

"But... Miss Shiro from headquarters just called, and is asking-"

"Tell her if she wants to keep her job, stop talking about it. Fine, I know some of it, but it's confidential, as usual. I trust she'd want to keep her job, too. Answer your question?"

"A-alright... thanks, Saitama."

 **{The lounge, break-time...]**

"Hey, Saitama..."

"No, Yona. I don't know anything."

"Aw, Saitama, why so cold? You don't even know what I'm asking yet-"

"You're going to ask if I know what was it that Chairman- well, former Chairman Genus was doing yesterday that made him retire? I don't know anything. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be eating lunch now."

"Alright then, keep your secrets." Yona said, pouting. While she walked away she managed to trip. Thrice.

 **[After work, leaving the building at City G...}**

"Well, we'll meet here again tomorrow." Awada said to the group.

"Alright. Wanna go for Udon again? My treat." Soba suggested.

"Sure, why not?" Yona agreed.

"I don't see a problem. I think I'll go for dinner, as well." Awada replied.

"I'm good. I already have some leftovers from yesterday." Saitama answered. He had made some Kombu-soup and was learning to make Oyakodon, and made a little too much attempting to make them. They all turned out okay, though. At least he didn't need to worry about cooking for the next three days, since he made 4 bowls in total. He ate the first one, before trying another three times to ensure the egg wasn't burnt this time.

Needless to say, he was out of chicken and eggs, so he wanted to go grocery shopping, as well.

"Aw, come on, Saitama, why not go for Udon together?" Soba asked. "My treat, same place! Don't tell me they're not delicious enough?"

"Nope. I already have some leftovers." Saitama answered.

"Then why not just have Udon again? I mean, you can keep the leftovers for tomorrow as well, can't you?" Yona suggested.

"True, but I think I'll just have leftover Oyakodon instead." Saitama declined.

"Still, why not go together once in a while, right, Saitama?" Awada questioned.

"We went for Udon together just around a week ago. Not to mention, I also need to get some groceries, and there's a 60% off sale today, and it's the last day, as well. So I really can't accompany you guys. The sale's just right nearby, here in City G, so I can't get it after we get Udon. I really can't, so sorry about that." Saitama said, laying all his cards on the table.

"Aw... okay then." Yona pouted again.

"Stop pouting, Yona. You're a mature adult, aren't you?" Soba said, patting her head.

"Don't pet me! I'm 23!" She said angrily.

"Who was the one pouting earlier?" Soba teased.

"Why you-" Yona wanted to retort, but then Awada calmed her down.

"Stop fighting already... Also, Saitama left already." Awada sighed.

The three of them were actually working together so that they could ask Saitama about what really happened to Genus. He just so happened to have been called by the Chairman, and the Chairman just so happened to retire the day after? There was no way it was a coincidence!

"Was it some sort of secret corporate deal or something?" Soba hypothesized.

"Or maybe Saitama was secretly chosen to be the successor?" Yona wondered.

"No way. Saitama's a competent man in work, I'll give him that. But running the company just isn't something I can see him do at all." Soba shot down the idea.

The answer of 'confidential' was a nice convenient wall to further questions, but who was to say that anyone would know outside of work? Not to mention Saitama can't possibly be so thick-skinned to deny all three of them... right?

"We should follow him, at least. The plan to lure him to my place failed. We didn't think up a plan B in time, so I guess following him is the best I can come up with." Soba sighed.

"No... that's a bit much, seeing as we're literally stalking him, and can possibly be arrested for that." Awada shook his head. There was no way they'd do that to satisfy their own curiosity.

"That's what I figured. Well, we'll come back to this later, I guess..." Soba sighed, as the three of them walked to the commuting station to head home.

 **{From behind a building, in an alleyway...}**

"Looks like the colleagues of Master Saitama have left. They were attempting to trail him. Could it be... Master's strength is being discovered!?" A cyborg said to himself. This was obviously Genos, now fully repaired.

"I can't get excited. Today, I am finally meeting him myself." Genus calmed himself down, and then traveled to Saitama's home apartment.

 **{The store with a 60% discount on everything...}**

" _I have a bad feeling about something..."_ Saitama thought. _"Did I leave the oven on?"_ Saitama wondered as he paid for the groceries.

* * *

 **Chapter 5 is now uploaded! Let me know what you readers think of the chapter. Also, there's more information below.  
**

 **1) Just like how Carnage Kabuto's Carnage Mode is based off Eva-01 from Neon Genesis Evangelion, his Raging Asura mode is obviously a nod to Asura from Asura's Wrath. An idea of his strength during his transformations is like this:**

* * *

 **A) Carnage Mode**

 **(i) Win against Metal Bat without fighting spirit in 3 minutes.**

 **(ii) Lose to Superalloy Darkshine after 15 minutes.**

 **(iii) Lose to Zombieman after exhausting himself from Carnage Mode.**

 **B) Raging Asura Mode**

 **(i) Instantly finish Metal Bat without fighting spirit.**

 **(ii) Lose to Superalloy Darkshine after 45 minutes to a couple hours.**

 **(iii) Still lose against Zombieman after exhausting himself.**

 **(iv) Gets stronger the angrier and greater his killing intent, which can increase up to 10 times his original strength.**

* * *

 **2) Saitama got his job 8760 hours after he started training.**

 **3) This is the last chapter for a while, as I will be busy with real-life stuff for a few months or so. (I fear no man. But that deadline... it scares me.)**

* * *

 **Also, Happy New Year!**


	6. Chapter 6: The Heavenly Dragon

**Chapter 6: The Heavenly Dragon (I)**

* * *

 **{Saitama's apartment...}**

"So that's the bad feeling I had..." Saitama said, as there was a certain overcoat-wearing figure right in front of his apartment. The others were avoiding him, and staring strangely at Saitama as they passed by. That man was also currently in an argument with the landlord.

"I don't care that you were that guy we saw a week ago, or the fact that Saitama saved you! You're disturbing people here! Go wait at the lobby for him or something, not right in front of his damn apartment! This is an apartment block, not a shopping center! You're technically trespassing on private property, if you don't own a room here! Leave, before I change my mind and call security already! I'll do it, I swear! Don't you think I'm some pushover! I'll drag you out myself if need be! Don't test my patience!" The landlord said, firing words out of his mouth like a machine gun.

"Master Saitama is on his way back. I shall wait until he arrives." Genos said calmly, ignoring the elderly man.

"Why you- ignore your elders will you!? We'll see about that- oh, Saitama! This crazy bastard's been waiting in front of your apartment for 30 minutes! It's not really all that long, but he's disturbing everyone else just by being here! Tell him to bugger off or something!" The landlord said, as he recognized Saitama.

"What are you doing here?" Saitama sighed, asking Genos.

"I'd like to learn under you, sensei!" He said, bowing to Saitama. This bewildered everyone else watching, and the landlord too.

"Sensei- of what? I don't buy a word you're saying. Saitama, is he telling the truth?" The landlord asked.

"Sadly, yes. Come on, let's get inside. You're disturbing everyone else." Saitama said, opening the door and carrying the groceries in.

"Master! Let me carry those for you!" Genos said, getting into the apartment after Saitama.

"Ugh... alright, show's over everyone. You can stop looking now." The landlord grumbled, dispersing the small crowd.

 **{Inside Saitama's apartment...}**

"Dude. Not cool. You didn't need to do that, you know." Saitama said in resignation. This person was trouble!

"I apologize for my actions, sensei." Genos said, bowing.

"That's enough. And stop calling me sensei. Are you here for dinner as well, by the way?" Saitama asked. "Oh wait, as a cyborg, do you even eat?"

"I can. Dr Kuseno, the person who engineered my body has made it so I can taste foodstuffs and convert them into chemical energy, master."

"Huh, that's nice of him. Also, don't call me master either- ah screw it. Still, why are you here, anyway? You have a problem or something?" Saitama asked.

"Problems? You would like to hear about my problems?" Genos asked.

"No, not really." Saitama deadpanned.

"I was 15 years old and still a normal human being. Even in this harsh world, I had a pretty happy and peaceful life with my family until then." Genos started telling his story.

"Didn't you hear? I said, I'm not interested." Saitama said, wondering if Genos even heard him.

"But one day, a crazy cyborg attacked our town all of a sudden. He had completely lost his mind... I guess, his brain had been damaged during its transplantation into his cyborg body. He left after destroying everything in the town. The parks, the schools, the buildings, my home..."

"Of course... my family didn't survive. Only I was miraculously spared, but as I was just a meek 15-year-old boy back then, I wouldn't have survived long all alone in the ruins of a town if Dr Kuseno hadn't passed town by chance and found me. Dr Kuseno is a scientist of justice and was pursuing the cyborg to stop him. I begged Dr Kuseno to transform me into a cyborg and was reborn as a cyborg who fights for justice. I made a promise to Dr Kuseno to find that cyborg one day and destroy him!"

"I would often require many reparations to my body due to my brash nature back then, yet the doctor had fixed me back up every time without fail! I was indebted to him. So, when I came of age, I founded my own detective agency to gain income and be able to pay the good doctor back for all he has done for me. While fighting monsters, I also learnt the true human nature while on the job, ridding the world of evil, from both monsters and monsters in human form. I gained experience from my days in the field, and had also obtained more and more upgrades to my cyborg body, all paid for by the profits of my detective agency, learning and gaining more skills while I kept the peace and eliminated monsters. Even the Heroes Association could ignore me no longer, and hired me as a shadow detective and also a private sweeper, and became an unofficial operative of the Heroes Association, on the same level as an S-Class hero in terms of status and authority."

At this time, Saitama was getting more and more irate, his veins showing through his forehead.

"But who knew, that time when I was hunting down the Demon-level threat that appeared in City-Z, the monster had manged to get the upper hand on me, due to my inability to finish them off in time. Had you not appeared, my life would've ended at that moment. I am as thankful to you as I am to Dr. Kuseno, increasing my heavy sense of responsibility. As you accepted me to be my master as Dr Kuseno had accepted to transform my body into a cyborg, I would want to learn how to defeat evil with overwhelming power such as yours. Please teach me how to be strong like you. Dr Kuseno-"

At this time, Saitama couldn't take it anymore.

"ENOUGH! KNOCK IT OFF ALREADY!" Saitama yelled in anger. "SHORTEN IT TO TWENTY WORDS OR LESS!"

...

"Would you prefer the shorter version?" Genos asked.

"Yes, please do. You're giving me flashbacks of when I had to read the 300-page contract for my company, word for word without missing a single thing." Saitama said.

"I am here to become your disciple so I may learn how to become strong, like you." Genos spoke frankly.

"...Genos." Saitama said, his face now serious.

"Yes!" Genos answered with fervor.

"How old are you?" Saitama asked.

"19, sir." Genos answered.

"So young... you'll surpass me in no time." Saitama said, but then shook his head. "Now that I think about it... probably not."

"Eh? Why, master!? Am I not good enough?" Genos asked frantically. Was his master already rejecting him?

"The way I got strong is through strength-training. I don't think that'll work for cyborgs like you." Saitama sighed, getting straight to the point. He really doubted that this guy could actually learn how to get strong the same way he did. After some short thinking, he deduced that Genos was probably incapable of learning how to get stronger the same way he did. "Not to mention, I probably need not ask this, but chances are your Doctor Kuseno didn't create arms that can gain strength through training, did he?"

"I see..." Genos said, a look of understanding on his face.

"Still, allow me to learn from you anyway!" Genos said, a look of determination on his face which said that he wasn't taking no for an answer.

"I have no idea what you can or can not learn, so suit yourself." Saitama sighed. "Wait, how exactly are you planning to do that?" Saitama asked.

"I plan to stay here with you, master. So that I may observe what you do daily." Genos said bluntly.

"...no."

"I have rent money." Genos said, a stack of cash colliding with the table. It was incredibly thick, and the envelope was nearly full to bursting.

"...did you bring your toothbrush?"

"Yes!"

...

 **{The landlord's room, the day after...]**

"...and that's how he's staying with me." Saitama explained to his landlord.

"I can't believe that you're willing to let that kooky prick stay with you, but fine with me. You say he's paying for rent?" The landlord asked.

"Yep. He even got this fat-stack and just plopped it onto my desk without hesitation." Saitama said, taking out the huge envelope, crammed with money.

"Well damn, he's loaded. Well, nothing to complain about. I'll just take this and you won't need to give me rent for the next... however long this'll pay for." The landlord said, pocketing the money.

"Hey, how can I be sure you're not gonna cheat on me?" Saitama said, a stern look on his face.

"Trust me on this, I'm not taking more money from you for the next... however long the money'll pay for, I guess." The landlord said, taking out the cash fro the envelope and started counting it. "10, 20, 30, 40, 50, so that's one month... 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, two months... 10, 20, 30..."

"Alright. I swear, don't cheat on me, alright?" Saitama said, before leaving the landlord's personal apartment. The landlord on the other hand was simply counting the money, not listening to what Saitama just said.

 **{Saitama's room...}**

"Alright, I explained it to the landlord already. I'm going to work, by the way. So take care of the place for me, yeah? Though, if anything turns up, you can leave and do whatever. Just remember to turn off the lights when not in use." Saitama reminded Genos before he left for work.

"Alright, master. I shall ensure no one encroaches upon your property. If so..." Genos said, his arms blazing brightly.

"Woah, woah, woah. No killing or immolating anyone, either." Saitama said, sighing. Why was this guy not normal like everyone else? "Just, take care of my apartment, alright?"

"Yes, master!" Genos said resolutely.

" _Groan..._ well, I'll be going, now." Saitama said, walking out his apartment, and leaving for work.

 **{F-city, close to the subsidiary company...}**

"Huh? What's that?" Saitama noticed a crowd of bald people wearing black power suits. Every single one of them were bald. They seemed to be protesting about work being unfair or something.

" _Bald, huh..."_ At that thought, Saitama shivered, realizing that he had trained to the point he had almost lost all of his hair, back then. But when he stopped training, his hair stopped falling, and through the help of many, MANY hair-growth gels, he managed to get his hair back to normal.

"Ugh... I still have nightmares about it..." Saitama said, shivering a little. Usually he didn't care, but then when he truly realized how close he was to baldness, he managed to stop in the nick of time. Right before all of it fell off, Saitama had close to no hair left, and it looked as if he got a buzz-cut, even when he had never cut his hair.

Touching his thick black hair, Saitama heaved a sigh of relief, and walked off.

 **[5 minutes later...]**

Saitama arrived at the building, and had went to the meet-up location, where everyone else was waiting.

"Morning, everyone." Saitama waved to everyone, attracting their attention.

"Oh, Saitama, good morning!" Awada greeted.

"Morning, Saitama." Soba said.

"Saitama! You're here! Morning!" Yona greeted as well.

"Huh, why's everyone's in a good mood today?" Saitama asked.

"Nothing much. Just that we're almost done with this project, then we can go back to the main building." Soba said.

"We're that fast? Or is it there's very little to report, or nothing noteworthy enough to be written?" Saitama asked.

"Everyone here does their job well! There's nothing much to report, and everything's almost all said and done! Yona and I already interviewed the other employees, and nothing out of the ordinary is happening! Everything's as clean as a whistle!" Awada said, as bubbly as usual.

"Cool, let's finish up, then we can get back. Right?" Saitama asked to make sure.

"Yep! If we finish early, we'll get to go back! And since we finished our project before the allotted time, we even get a bonus!" Soba said, fist-pumping. At that, everyone smiled. The company was not only generous with the pay, it was also generous in bonuses!

"How much?" Saitama asked, perked up. Money was something he loved, no matter the occasion. Never mind that he is now basically a billionaire, since Genus had deposited a princely sum of exactly 1 billion yen (9.1 million in terms of US Dollars) in his account before he had resigned publicly as Chairman.

Money was money, and you could never have too much of it. Like, ever.

"A total of 2,000,000 yen, with 500,000 each!" Awada beamed. Their company was generous! 2 million for just finishing up the task earlier?

"Nice!" Saitama said, equally happy. "So what's the last thing we need to do?" Saitama asked.

"Well, we just need to submit a copy to the Chief Administrative Officer of the subsidiary company, and then we can leave!" Awada answered.

"Eh? Then why didn't you guys do it yet?" Saitama asked. Didn't handing in a report take like, what, 30 seconds? What was everyone waiting for?

"Um, it's stupid, but we need to all be present to hand it in, apparently." Soba answered.

"That's dumb... Well, alright, I'm here. Let's go hand it in!" Saitama said, eager to finish up. The faster he received his money, the better.

 **{The Chief Administrative Officer's office}**

The C.A.O of the subsidiary company of Silver-Safe Security, was in his office, doing paperwork. He was a young man around 22 years of age, and was quite good-looking. He had silver hair, and hazel eyes. He actually looked a bit more effeminate than most other guys his age. Then again, as CEO of such a prominent company at such a young age, he naturally didn't have time to do any weight training to gain muscle, or anything pointless like that.

During his breaks, he would usually look at the pure-silver safe in the middle of his office. That silver safe was their company logo, and it was the inspiration for the company name in the first place. Contrary to popular belief among his employees, it wasn't actually completely compromised of pure silver, rather, only the outer plating was. The remainder was a mixture of silver and titanium, and the innermost layer was compromised of Osmium, purely to increase weight.

Needless to say, he was proud of his company. While that, he also received a message that the quarterly inspections by employees of the main corporation were to visit and make reports. They were also to hand in a copy to him personally. Why all of the visiting members needed to be present at the same time, he never knew.

However, he DID know that they were done, as every time the inspection team from the main corporation arrived, they would always finish within 3 days. Today was the third day, and now, he only awaited them. The near-perfection of his company and his employees gave him a small grin.

And as he had just thought about them, the lift sound was heard. " _Ah, that must be them..."_ He thought.

As he looked towards the lift, he noticed a certain someone...

"Ah, you must be the Chief Administrative Officer, Mr Suzuki." Soba greeted him, and had a copy of the report to hand over to him. But the C.A.O simply stood still, a look of shock on his face.

"Um... sir?" Soba asked after the C.A.O gave no response. But in his mind, many thoughts were rushing through his mind. Among that, a question was raised...

 _"I-isn't he... This can't be real... T-this employee is...'Heavenly Dragon' Hito Soba!?"_

 **[Sometime ago...]**

 _The C.A.O of Silver-Safe Security, Suzuki Sakamoto had just only been promoted to his current position as an administrative officer to the Silver-Safe Security company, and accepted the invitation that was given to all C.A.O's of the Meliorem group to watch a match which wasn't held publicly, and known in the underground only. Even those whom belong to the underworld of society participated, and some Yakuza bosses were either participating, or watching the show. And currently, it was the final match._

 _On one side, it was a large man around 2.3 meters tall, and he had grey-ish hair, and a large spruce mustache. His body was sculpted like a Greek statue, and his very being radiated power. Despite that, his attire wasn't fit for a match in the first place. He was wearing a black suit, a top-hat, and an ornate monocle. It looked as if he was simply visiting a museum to enjoy works of art._

 _However, a book shouldn't be judged by its cover. In the underground, he was known as 'Noble Demon' William T. Roberts, a man whom challenged ring after ring to become champion of every underground fighting arena. And this was the last one in his journey to become undefeated in the underground martial arts community._

 _On the other side, it was a young man that looked just around 20, and his small 1.72 meter frame made him look tiny in comparison to the behemoth of a man before him. He was wearing a casual t-shirt and pants, and looked even less of a fighter than 'Noble Demon' William. At least he gave of the imposing presence of a strong fighter. This person on the other hand looked like the average Takahashi, Tanaka and Sato. The only defining features he had were his green eyes and amber hair._

 _"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! THE LAST MATCH IS UPON US, THE STROKE OF FATE WHICH'LL DECIDE THE NEXT REIGNING CHAMPION! ON THIS SIDE, YOU KNOW HIM AS THE DEMON OF CLASS, AS DEADLY IN COMBAT AS HE IS STYLISH AND ELEGANT, A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR, 'NOBLE DEMON' WILLIAM T. ROBERTS!" The MC yelled into his mic, setting up the atmosphere. Even without that, the atmosphere was already feverish with excitement._

 _"AND ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ARENA... THE UNDISPUTED CHAMPION OF THE 'DRAGON-GATE' MATCHES! DEFENDING HIS 5-YEAR TITLE WITHOUT FAIL, UNDEFEATED IN HIS ENTIRE CAREER, GIVE IT UP FOR... 'HEAVENLY DRAGON' HITO SOBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The MC yelled with fervor, though it was quickly drowned out by the crowd's cheering. It wasn't really hard to determine whom the crowd favored._

 _"Huh, Mr Ayashi, is this man really special?" Mr Suzuki asked a fellow C.A.O of the other subsidiary businesses._

 _"Oh, right. It's your first time. This man is 'Heavenly Dragon' Hito Soba, and his renown is written in legend. There was even a large event, well, more like a battle royal, where as many as 100~ish fighters from all around the globe, well, more like all 26 main cities, from A to Z. Anyway, he won the battle royal without even taking as so much as a single hit." Ayashi answered him._

 _"Really? He's really powerful, then." Suzuki said. "Then what about in the Super-Fight ring? Some contestants are really strong, too. Including 'Void Fist' Suiryu and 'Hell Assassination Fist' Bakuzan." Suzuki asked._

 _"Well, Hito Soba refuses to be acknowledged outside of the underground martial arts ring, but I can tell you this, he could probably make 'Dark Hell-Assassination Fist' Bakuzan look like a total joke. Even 'Noble Demon' William T. Roberts is stronger than him. If I'm not mistaken, 'Void Fist' Suiryu would probably have a real hard time winning against 'Noble Demon' William T. Roberts, but against 'Heavenly Dragon'... he might not even need to lift a finger to defeat Suiryu." Ayashi answered Suzuki's question._

 _"Wow... I wonder if they'll be able to get to S-Class if they were to register as Heroes..." Suzuki wondered aloud._

 _"Heh, William T. Roberts'd make it as the second-rank A-Class hero at least, surpassing Iairon but he should only rank in at second when considering total fighting power, cause I don't think he'd be able to win against Sweet Mask. Well, he looks dapper and kinda fits Sweet-Mask's philosophy, so maybe he does stand a chance if Sweet-Mask allows him to get into S-Class."_

 _"But if we're talking about 'Heavenly Dragon'... well, he's called that for a reason. People say that if he were given a threat-level... it'd be Dragon, and maybe above." Ayashi said._

 _"Is he really that strong?" Suzuki asked._

 _"Just watch the fight." Ayashi pointed at the arena below._

 _In the arena, William T. Roberts attacked with a flurry of strikes so fast that it seemed as if he had 6 arms. But whom he was attacking, the average-looking man, seemed as if he was just standing there, yet the 'Noble Demon's strikes looked as if hey weren't landing whatsoever. It appeared as if the punches merely phased through him. Obviously, it was just that he was dodging them right before the strikes landed, giving the appearance that they were phasing through him._

 _For a good 30 seconds, the 'Noble Demon' was the only one attacking, whereas the 'Heavenly Dragon' simply dodged the strikes, with an expression of ease on his face, as if he was taking a simple walk in the park._

 _After that, 'Noble Demon' William T. Roberts had stopped his assault, and backed up._

 _"You're strong, Hito Soba. As expected of the legendary 'Eastern Dragon Of The Heavenly Gates'." He commented._

 _"You even know my other titles? I'm flattered. You did your homework." Soba said, a look of indifference on his face, save for a small smile on his face._

 _"Of course, I need to, to defeat the 'Strongest Man In The Underworld'." William T. Roberts said, changing his stance into a lowered, more offensive stance._

 _"Well, come on then, take my title. I'm starting to get bored of waiting already." Soba said, a slight interest in his tone._

 _As if by universal accord, a wind blew a cloud of dust into the arena, shielding both "Noble Demon' and 'Heavenly Dragon' from view, and as soon as the whole arena was covered, the bigger frame made a move, and struck the smaller figure with a punch, which blocked it with a palm. Following up with a kick to the ribs, the other had raised his forearm to block the attack._

 _Blow by blow, the dust slowly subsided, until the image of them both grappling each other's hands were visible._

 _"Oh? For a man of your stature, you're really strong." William noted._

 _"You're not bad yourself. This is way more than what a normal person is capable of." Soba commended._

 _"Well, everyone who fought here is no ordinary person. But to hear that from you, I'm delighted at your praise." William said, as they separated, gaining distance from each other._

 _Suddenly, the both of them smiled._

 _"Should we take things up a notch?" Soba asked._

 _"I've never once gone serious before. I thank you for this opportune moment." William said smilingly, as they walked to each other calmly._

 _As they arrived before each other, the did the unthinkable._

 _They shook hands._

 _"No hard feelings?" Soba asked_

 _"No hard feelings, whoever wins." William agreed._

 _What happened next was a fight to be retold in legend._

* * *

"...Sir? Hello?" Soba asked, bringing the C.A.O back from his reverie.

"O-oh, sorry. Thanks for your hard work. W-would you like some coffee?" Suzuki asked after receiving the report, still a bit shaken.

"Um, no thanks, sir. We'll be going, now." Soba said, waving his hand.

"W-wait, if I may, could you accompany me for a bit? I would like to speak with you privately." Suzuki asked.

"Um, okay...? You guys leave first, I'll talk with Mr Suzuki." Soba said, puzzled.

While everyone else left, Suzuki sat down on a chair, breathing ragged.

"Sir, are you okay...?" Soba asked, worried.

"No, no... I'm fine... I just didn't expect to see the legend appear before me today..." Suzuki said, calming down.

"What legend? Wait.. you don't mean-" Soba then understood why Suzuki called him.

"It really is you, 'Heavenly Dragon', Hito Soba." Suzuki said. "I wouldn't have guessed that-" Before he could finish his sentence, his mouth was covered by Soba's right hand.

"Shhhh! Could we kep this off the record please? I retired like, 2 years ago after the fight with William." Soba said, panicky.

"I know, I know. Still, what really made you retire?" Suzuki asked.

"Well, I- you know what, please just keep this quiet, alright? I retired because after the fight with William, nothing else was entertaining anymore, as every other challenger was either too weak, or surrendered before the match even begun. I wanted to fight him again, but after learning he quit underground fighting, there wasn't any more reason for me to keep fighting!" Soba explained.

"I see... still, it really was a shock to learn that you're an employee at the main corporation... I didn't think we'd meet this way, really." Suzuki said. "That being said..."

Suzuki then pulled out an action-figure of Soba wearing his casual clothes, bowed, and asked, "Please give me your autograph!"

"Um, okay...? But don't tell anyone else, alright?" Soba said. Suzuki nodded vigorously, accepting the terms. Soba then signed the sole of his feet with a H.S (D), his signature autograph. H.S stands for his initials, Hito Soba, and D meaning Dragon.

"Thank you very much!" Suzuki bowed.

"Alright, alright. Just remember, tell no one else." Soba said, giving Suzuki a stern glare, before leaving.

 **[15 minutes later...]**

"Oh, Soba, you're here. What did he want with you?" Awada asked.

"Just some stuff. Nothing much." Soba replied with a smile. "Well, let's get back, then!"

"Before that, let's go get some ice-cream as congratulations! We finished early! Not to mention, each of us gets a 500,000 yen bonus!" Yona said, jumping around happily.

"Speaking of ice-cream, we're really close to City F, so why not go to Zeniru Ice Cream?" Saitama suggested.

"Good thinking! Not to mention, It's the capital of Ice-Cream, with that being the location for the largest branch of Zeniru's Ice Cream, a whole building! For Ice-Cream!" Yona practically drooled.

"Yeah, and Zeniru's penthouse is there, too." Soba said. "Still, did they really not plan... that, out?" Soba said, pointing at the huge building with what appears to be... a massive turd of solid gold on the roof.

"I have no idea what they were thinking when they designed it. Really, is it that hard to include a cone or something?" Saitama sighed. Even he had to admit, what was supposed to be ice-cream was instead taken as a turd by the majority of everyone whom recognized the brand. In fact, people called it 'The Golden Turd', after it's shape, despite it being meant to be ice-cream.

"Whatever, we're going there to enjoy ice-cream, not talk about the design-choices of the rich." Saitama mentioned. "We should get going, anyway. The earlier we get the bonus, the better. So let's just get the ice-cream, and then we can go collect our moola." Saitama said.

 **[30 minutes later, Right in front of the largest branch of Zeniru Ice-Cream}**

"Huh. I guess they weren't exaggerating when they say this branch was literally an entire building." Saitama said, looking at a building that was 5-stories tall. Right on top of the building was a small version of 'The Golden Turd', but this time, there was a cone underneath it. Therefore, no one called it 'The Golden Turd Jr.'

"You think they realized the mistake when they did it without the cone on Zeniru's penthouse, or did he not have the budget for a solid-gold cone?" Soba asked.

"Now that I think about it, it was probably just unstable. I mean, gold's heavy, right? Imagine a pure-gold, massive ice-cream cone, which has to be balanced by a single cone and maybe a few stilts at the bottom, with an increasingly smaller base-area, might I add, and supported by what would probably be super-thin steel wires. I think they shaped the ice-cream without the cone because of architectural problems or something." Saitama gave his opinion. "I mean, they could also have supported it with larger, more massive stilts, but then it'd look ugly. They could've also shaped a cup for it, but..."

Saitama the pointed to the sign which says: 'NO TO CUPS, YES TO CONES!'

"That's true... hey wait, when were you the engineer?" Soba joked.

"I may not look it, but I graduated with a bachelor's degree in Civil Engineering & Construction, okay? I just didn't get accepted anywhere because I didn't have enough work experience. And when I got a job at one of the best places to work at, our company, I could basically just throw my degree into the trash, cause there's nowhere better to work at." Saitama responded.

"Okay then, Mr I'm-Actually-A-Civil-Engineer, why did they get to build a cone here, then?" Soba asked.

"For one, it's less massive, therefore there's less strain on the supports. Not to mention, gold's close to 20 tons per cubic meter, so that one small ice-cream cone of gold on the top right there-"

Saitama pointed to the huge gold cone.

"-weighs the same as three fully-grown elephants. That, or a fully-grown Whale-Shark. Now imagine a huge cone of gold, with ice-cream on the top, weighing probably almost hundreds of thousands of tonnes. Paying for the massive gold ice-cream statue would be one thing, it's another thing entirely to keep it actually stable." Saitama answered Soba's question.

"Hmph, you don't need to be an engineer to know that." Soba said, smirking.

"Well, you asked. Anyway, are we getting ice-cream or what? Or are we just gonna stand here and gawk at the huge ice-cream cone at the top?" Saitama asked.

"Yeah, yeah. We should." Soba said, sighing. "Let's go get ice-cream. This is your suggestion anyway, Yona."

"Yayyy, Ice-cream!" Yona said childishly, running into the building.

" _Sigh.._ Well, let's go after her." Awada said, smiling helplessly.

 **{Inside the building...}**

"Fuahhhhhh~" Yona gasped in amazement. There was ice-cream everywhere, and it was so colorful and pretty, it could put even Willy Wonka's chocolate factory to shame.

"Damn, it's colorful. Imagine if an epileptic person came in here, they would have one hell of a headache." Soba said, commenting on the surroundings.

"Look there." Saitama said, and then pointed to a sign, which said, **' SEIZURE WARNING, YOU HAVE BEEN INFORMED. ANY INJURIES OR SEIZURES CAUSED WILL NOT BE THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE ESTABLISHMENT.'** It was also the only thing in the building that wasn't overly colored, being pure white, with black letters on it. It was also written in bold.

"Holy shit, that happened before?" Soba said, surprised.

"I dunno, but the fact that they needed a sign says plenty." Saitama pointed out. It was true, though. If it had never happened before, why else would there be a large sign warning about it?

"Right. Anyway, let's get our ice-cream." Soba said.

 **[15 minutes later...]**

"Damn, the line is long." Soba complained. They were in a line, and were already there for 15 minutes before it was almost their turn.

"Even on a Tuesday, a working day might I add, this place is packed. Now imagine weekends, or maybe school holidays?" Saitama said.

"Yeesh. Now I know why Zeniru gets to afford an entire building for a house. Man's a multi-trillionaire, if everyday business is like this." Soba sighed.

"Anyway, it's our turn, now." Saitama pointed out.

"Good day, welcome to Zeniru's Ice-Cream Parlor. What would you like?" The worker asked.

"I'll take a Quintuple-Fudge Deluxe Delight, please!" Yona said cheerily.

"One Espresso-Frostissimo." Saitama ordered. **(See below chapter for details)**

"A slice of the Strawberry-Snowflake ice-cream cake, please. I'd also like a Mint-Mango Pudding, thanks." Awada requested.

"I think I'll just take a key-lime flavor ice-cream cone. Two scoops." Soba said, pointing at the key-lime ice-cream in the tub-selection below.

"Of course. Please wait right over there." The worker then pointed to the collection area.

As they arrived to the collection area, their orders were ready, with the exception of Yona's Quintuple-Fudge Deluxe Delight.

"Please wait a bit, we seem to be a bit low on the fudge. Apologies for the extended wait..." The cashier apologized.

"That's alright. Could you bring it to us when the order is ready?" Soba asked.

"Of course." The cashier responded.

As everyone paid for their orders, they found an empty table not far off.

"Geez, why is my order the only one delayed?" Yona said, complaining.

"Well, Soba's order is the easiest, being only like two scoops of ice-cream. Awada's ice-cream cake and pudding was probably already prepped beforehand, so all they needed to do was get one from the freezer. Mine, being a sundae, also doesn't take very long. Probably finished it when we arrived to the collection counter. Fudge however... well, let's just say it's just you being unlucky that they ran low on fudge right before your order was completed." Saitama responded.

"Aw... that sucks. Saitama, can I have a bite?" Yona said, quickly getting over the fact that her order was delayed.

"Don't you hate coffee or something?" Saitama asked. Yona HATED coffee, which was why she always drank juice instead.

"Oh, right... Soba~" Yona then turned to Soba, eyeing his two-scoop ice-cream.

" _Sigh..._ This always happens. ONE scoop at most. I'll take the other. And when your order arrives you better share." Soba glared.

"Alright, alright..." Yona said, taking a small lick of the ice-cream. "Key-lime... not bad!" Yona said, before taking one bite.

One bite to devour the entire top-dollop.

"Brain-freeze incoming in three, two, one..." Saitama counted down, and as expected, Yona was shivering, grasping her head in pain.

"Does she never learn...?" Soba sighed.

"This is what- the 14th time this happened when we went out for ice cream?" Saitama stated.

"Now, now, Yona, relax a little, you're supposed to enjoy it so it lasts until you get your fudge-ice-cream. Here, have some of my cake." Awada offered.

"Ow... I think I'll relax a little. My head..." Yona said, massaging her temples.

"Excuse me, here's your order of Quintuple-Fudge Deluxe Delight." A waiter said, carrying a massive bowl of fudge ice-cream with five different colors of fudge, each color representing a different flavor. Obviously.

"Ah, thanks." Soba received the ice-cream in Yona's stead, and placed the massive bowl onto the table with a loud clang. It was really massive. Like, 20 kilos heavy, and 25 cm tall, excluding the bowl.

"Ugh... why did I eat the ice-cream so fast?" Yona pouted while rubbing her head, still under the effects of brain-freeze.

"Still, that, is one massive bowl." Saitama commented on the sheer size of Yona's order.

"I know, right? That's probably the reason that it's like, 240,000 yen." Soba added on.

"Seriously? Can she even, wait, no. That's a stupid question, yes, she can DEFINITELY finish it. WHY would she order it, is the question?" Saitama wondered.

"It's just one of her wonders..." Soba sighed.

"Well, we should finish up and get back as soon as possible." Saitama said, digging in to his espresso sundae.

"Now, now, just relax, not like anything'll happen if we don't finish up, right?" Awada said, eating his pudding.

"I mean, what'll happen, a bunch of terrorists end up attacking the building?" Soba joked.

Suddenly, a loud shouting noise was heard outside the building.

"Here we are! Zeniru's den of inequality! Everything's so overpriced and huge and needlessly sweet! There's no point to it! Come, brothers! Let's sabotage Zeniru's greatest source of income! Then Zeniru'll know we mean business!"

"Well, Soba, you officially win the title of Jinx-King." Saitama commented. "Hey... haven't I seen them before or something...?" Saitama wondered aloud.

"T-terrorists?" Awada said, scared.

"Wait, it's the terrorist group! Everyone run!" Someone in the building commented, inciting a mass panic.

"Everyone, run! It's the terrorists!"

"Kyaaaah-"

"Someone call the heroes!"

And the whole building was wrought with chaos, everyone trying to get out of the building.

"Hey, what's going on!?" Soba asked, but no one answered, since everyone was too busy running away. Even the employees ran away.

Soon, only the four of them were left.

"Hm, boss! There's only four people left!" Someone reported to the biggest man in the group, their boss.

"Eh, isn't that B-Class criminal Hammerhead?" Yona had mostly recovered from her brain-freeze, and had only noticed the group of bald people wearing power suits. "Oh, my ice-cream!" Yona said, completely ignoring them, and enjoying her ice-cream.

"Huh? She's ignoring us!" Hammerhead didn't fail to notice that the girl among the group had ignored them, and was just enjoying her ice-cream.

"Holy shit, that's one massive ice-cream!" One of them said, noticing the massive size of the ice-cream Yona was eating.

"Grr...! She's probably looking down on us! Men! Show her what it means to disrespect the Paradisers!"

"YES BOSS!" The group said determinedly, as a group of ten marched towards her, while Yona was all the more clueless about her soon-to-befall fate.

"Wait, wait! There's a misunderstanding! We're just enjoying a day off! She also eats this much normally, and ignores everything else, she's not disrespecting your group of... Merchandisers?" Soba said, trying to calm them down. Unfortunately, Soba not getting their group name right only served to stoke their ire.

"Merchandisers? He's dissing us!"

"Think you're above the Paradisers, huh? We'll see about that..."

"You gonna die now, runt!"

Saitama sighed. They really needed to get a hobby. Well, he better go support Soba. If things got violent, at least Saitama could control things. He was also pretty sure no one among them was THAT strong anyway. All they had were some power suits, nothing else.

"Oh, Paradisers? I didn't hear that name right, sorry. No really, we don't want any trouble-" Soba's apology was cut short by a punch to his face.

"Shows you to disrespect us!" The one who punched Soba said angrily.

Contrary to his expectations to a heavily wounded Soba, however, he seemed perfectly fine.

"No, really, can we please not use violence?" Soba said nicely, hoping to diffuse the situation.

Behind the counter, three employees who didn't flee in time witnessed the whole ordeal.

 _"What's he doing!?"_ One of the employees whispered.

 _"I don't know, but we should take this time to run away!"_ Another suggested through whispers.

 _"Idiot, we'd be spotted! Be thankful they haven't noticed us yet! Maybe they'll stall them long enough for some heroes to arrive!"_ The third employee suggested.

Meanwhile, Soba was punched yet again in the gut, to no effect.

"Seriously, stop that!" Soba pleaded.

" _Is it my imagination, or are the punches having no effect?"_ The person who punched Soba, twice, wondered.

 _"Hey, wait a minute... isn't that..."_ At that moment, Hammerhead recognized who this person was.

It was only a single match, yet he had already committed that legendary man to memory.

At that moment, he felt a tremendous weight on his back, as he shivered uncontrollably. He needed to stop them, now. Not to save that person, but to save his underlings.

"STO-" Hammerhead yelled, but it was too late. Another Paradiser moved to strike Soba once more.

But instead of being hit again, Soba had grabbed the punch, to the surprise of the buck-toothed Paradiser whom attempted to punch Soba himself.

"Hey, hey. I already said it nicely, I wanted no trouble... But you tried to attack me three times. What's the meaning of this, huh?" Soba said, his voice deepening.

"Awada, Yona, look away, cover your ears, and think about happy thoughts. Whatever you do, don't look up." Soba warned. Awada complied, covering his ears and huddling into his seat, whereas Yona was just eating her ice-cream, not even noticing what Soba had said. Good thing was, she was already facing away, and by courtesy of Saitama, her ears were covered by Saitama's hands.

"I made a promise..." Soba said, tightening his grip holding the fist, causing the buck-toothed Paradiser to scream in pain.

"AHHHHWHATISTHISHE'SSOSTRONGHELPHELPHELPITHURTSITHURTSITHURTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS-"

Soba then gripped his hand even harder, causing the Paradiser to squeal even louder, causing the other Paradisers to back off in fear.

"...that I would not fight anyone else, until we settled that match properly." Soba then looked up, and his face gave every other Paradiser a shiver down their spine.

"Well then. I guess I'll have to break that promise." Saying that, Soba then ripped off the buck-toothed Paradiser's arm, and before he could react, Soba kicked the head of the Paradiser clean off.

"Sorry, William. I suppose I need to show off the might of the 'Heavenly Dragon' in public."

* * *

 **Here's Chapter 6! Let me know about your opinions! Also, more information below.**

 **1) The addition of Soba's background as a super-strong underground fighter was mostly inspired by Kengan Asura and Baki the Grappler, with Soba being based on the cliche 'Unexpectedly Super-Strong' stereotype. Yes, his character'll be developed further, contrary to my original simply plan of 'Noodle-making side-character dude'. Soba's moniker of 'Heavenly Dragon' kinda came naturally. Must be the marathon of Highschool DxD a few months ago.**

 **2) Saitama got his job 525600 minutes after he started training.**

 **3) I managed to finish this chapter up with time I got when I was free, since I thought I'd at least finish uploading the two chapters for this month. But, after this, I will be busy until March. I will make up for the other chapters for the next months, though. I'll just have to be a BIT busier.**

 **4) 'Frostissimo' is a portmanteau of 'Frost' and 'Fortissimo'. The item itself is a sundae.**


	7. Chapter 7: The Modern Butler

**Chapter 7: The Modern Butler**

* * *

It was mayhem. A single person alone was utterly slaughtering the Paradisers, when they were able to take down even a few A-Class hero with their suits alone. Then again, it can't be blamed on them. After all, that single person was Hito Soba, also known as the 'Heavenly Dragon'.

"H-h-h-holy shit! Ru-" A Paradiser said after witnessing the sheer battle power of Soba, but it was too late, as he was already upon him, and with a swift flash his head was disconnected from his body.

Every second a Paradiser died either swiftly or gruesomely, with blood splattering all over the place. Not only that, the power-suits that could destroy a large building were like paper in front of Soba.

"Damn. I guess he didn't need help. He's actually pretty strong... Well, they're terrorists or something, so it's probably okay to kill them..." Saitama said to himself, but then a head rolled towards him, a face of fear and resignation on it.

"...It's probably okay, right?" Saitama asked himself, as he wasn't certain anymore. Meanwhile, Awada was still huddled under the table as per Soba's instructions, whereas Yona literally couldn't hear anything with Saitama's hands over her ears, and her eyes were focused on her ice-cream and her ice-cream alone.

Hammerhead had long since ran away, since he knew that fighting with the 'Heavenly Dragon' was basically seeking death. All he did was get paid by an organization to test out their battle-suits, not get slaughtered by a Dragon-level threat in human form!

" _Accepting their proposal was stupid! I knew this was a bad idea!"_ Hammerhead thought to himself. Sure, he wanted to break in and actually get them himself, and was willing for a few casualties on his side, but then, some robots had actually OFFERED them the suits so they could collect battle-data. Sure, there wasn't any bloodshed, and he was allowed to do anything he wanted with the suits in exchange for the 'battle data' the robots kept on talking about, but he was sure that something was off...

' _I can't care less if they hired the 'Heavenly Dragon' to kill us or he was just there by complete coincidence, I'm getting out of here!"_ Survival was the one and only thing on his mind currently.

Out of nowhere, however, a person dressed in a butler's uniform had suddenly appeared before Hammerhead.

"Ah, so here you are, Hammerhead. But where are your other followers?" The butler asked. He was a young man that had an androgynous appearance, but looked more like a woman due to his delicate features. He also had black hair with large grey eyes. His hair was also tied in a topknot.

"Huh!? Who are you supposed to be then!? Ah, you know what, I don't care. All I care about is getting the hell away from here!" Hammerhead said frantically, as he continued running away.

"I'm afraid-" The butler said, suddenly pulling out three kunai, and throwing them at Hammerhead, aiming for his vital points. Barely registering them, Hammerhead had only noticed them in the nick of time as he raised his hands to block them.

"-that I'll have to bring you back by force. Dead or alive means nothing to me." The butler suddenly smiled. The difference was, it didn't look like one of a human's. It looked more like a demon's smile, being unnaturally curved.

Hammerhead then realized that this was no ordinary butler. After all- WHAT BUTLER HAD THROWING KNIVES AND PINPOINT ACCURACY!? (a certain hell of a butler does)

"Who are you?" Hammerhead asked again.

"I didn't answer the first time, what makes you think I'd answer this time?" The butler said with disdain.

This angered Hammerhead. First, the 'Heavenly Dragon' showed up. Okay, that he couldn't do anything about. Now this prissy, wishy-washy _cunt_ had tried to attack him? Hammerhead?

"You know what, I found a perfect outlet to let my stress out on now. I don't stand a snowflake's chance in all 9 layers of hell against the 'Heavenly Dragon', but hell itself'll freeze over if I'd let some pussy-butler get the better of me!" Hammerhead said, cracking his knuckles.

"What a rude and crude man. Very well, A shame I could not bring you to Mr Zeniru, but I'll simply present your head to him, I suppose." The butler smiled again, this time taking out a ninjato from the inside of his suit.

 **{Meanwhile, the remains of what used to be Zeniru's largest Ice-Cream Parlor...}**

Soba exhaled deeply, looking at the carnage he caused. He had to say... he went slightly overboard. Blood, viscera, shattered pieces of battle-suits...

He even promised to William that he won't get in another fight until they settled their rematch! But then these assholes...

" _Sigh..._ Well, what's done is done." Soba unclenched his fists, heaving a sigh.

"Damn, Soba. Isn't that a little much?" A voice sounded from behind Soba, causing him to turn back.

The person who stated Soba's destruction was none-other than Saitama. His hands were no longer covering Yona's ears, as there were no more screams of death, seeing as everyone else had died. Awada meanwhile was still huddling under the table, covering his ears, doing as Soba said.

"We should clean up a bit. Awada doesn't deal well with blood, or guts." Saitama said, sighing. "Not to mention, you and those suited-guys really wrecked the place. Saitama said, looking around.

There was almost nothing left of the previously largest Ice-Cream Parlor, belonging to Zeniru, it was now 'pile of rubble', belonging to Zeniru. Only Saitama's table had survived the carnage. Well, mostly because Saitama was the one destroying any rubble coming their way with one hand while still covering Yona's ears. And just in time, she had finished her ice-cream.

" _Fuaaaah~_ Thanks for the meal~." Yona said, patting her belly, which had not changed in shape, despite devouring about 20 kilograms of ice-cream and fudge in the span of ten minutes, which again, pretty much defies the law of conservation of mass.

"The wonders of Yona, indeed. 20 kilos of ice-cream. Gone." Saitama commented.

"Hey, it was delicious, okay?! Oh, wait, where's the rest of the building?" Yona asked, just only noticing the destruction of the ice-cream parlor they were in.

"Let's go, for now." Saitama said, picking Yona up, much to her chagrin, while motioning for Soba to pick up Awada.

 **[Later, An inconspicuous alleyway...}**

"Well, we're finally away from the destruction, now we can talk." Saitama said, laying down Yona, while Soba slowly put down Awada, and poked him, saying, "It's alright, you can get up now."

Only then, did Awada open his eyes and uncover his ears. "I-is everything over? Are we okay?" He asked adorably.

"Yep. We're okay." Soba replied. "Still, why did we end up leaving?" Soba asked.

"Well, if we're the only ones there, the owners probably won't care if we did it or not, we'll probably be the ones they'll ask compensation from." Saitama answered.

"Ah... I see." Soba mused. "That makes sense. Well, we better leave. Let's go collect that bonus already." Soba sighed. This was too much excitement for one day. Also, only Saitama knew about Soba slaughtering everyone else that appeared, Yona was none the wiser, and Awada was huddled like an obedient rabbit, so he didn't know anything. The only one left was Saitama.

"Also, Saitama, could you keep that on the down low?" Soba asked, hoping Saitama won't reveal his actual fighting strength. If he did, it'd cause a lot of problems.

"Keep what on the down low?" Saitama asked, not getting the point.

"Thanks." Soba said, misunderstanding that Saitama understood what he meant.

"Okay... so we should go then-" Soba wanted to leave, but at that moment, the universe shoved a middle finger in his face, in the form of a stray kunai. He expertly dodged it, obviously.

Yes. They happened to be in the same alleyway as the one that Hammerhead and Sonic were fighting in.

"Hmph. You think these petty tricks are enough to take down me?" Sonic jeered. Hammehead was looking worse for wear, however.

"Tch! Fighting in an alleyway is my forte! Don't think I'd go down so easily!" Hammerhead managed to crack a smile in that situation, though. In an alleyway, a single second was enough to turn the tables entirely!

"Eh? I missed one?" Soba wondered aloud as he noticed Hammerhead. His voice, attracting both Sonic and Hammerhead made them both turn to look at him.

Sonic didn't recognize him. But Hammerhead...

"H-H-H-H-H-He's here!" He barely managed to get those words out before sprinting off like a madman. It also wasn't hard-

 _thwack_

-for Soba to catch up instantly and trip Hammerhead.

"Hey, hey, weren't your group acting all high and mighty earlier, huh?" Soba said, his voice dropping the same way as when he had slaughtered the other Paradisers. Soba was obviously still mad.

"Okay, time to cover your ears and think happy thoughts, guys." Saitama said, motioning for his coworker's to cover their eyes and ears, which they did. He didn't want them to think bad about Soba, after all. He may not really care much, but it seemed like a dick move to let his reputation drop into the gutters.

Meanwhile, with Soba, his killing intent was radiating off his body like spears being pointed at anyone close to him. Even Awada and Yona felt the chills as they shivered slightly. Only Saitama and Sonic seemed unfazed.

" _Well, there seems to be someone capable of combat_ _here. If he can radiate this much killing intent, he's no stranger to the art of the kill, alright..."_ Sonic thought.

"I-I-I-I-I just wanted to get out of work, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME-" Hammerhead said, before begging profusely with his life.

"I see you have a relationship with this fellow?" Sonic asked, walking towards Soba.

"Hm? Oh, yeah. This asshole tried to attack us while we were just minding our own business." Soba responded.

"I'd ask to leave him alive, if possible. Mr Zeniru would like to see him alive." Sonic requested.

"Oh, that's fine." Soba said, his previous killing intent disappearing like it was never there.

" _He can control his killing intent to such a fine degree? This changes things. He must be a hidden master..."_ Sonic thought. "Well, Zeniru would be interested in meeting you, actually. Would you mind coming with me?" Sonic asked.

"Eh, sure...?" Soba answered, unsure if he heard that right. Zeniru, President of the multi-trillion yen business Zeniru Ice Cream, _that_ Zeniru?

"Hey, Soba, don't we need to go collect that bonus or something?" Saitama asked.

"We actually still have tomorrow to collect it, so it'd be fine. Also, not like this might take all that long, right?" Soba reasoned.

"But why are we actually going through with this again?" Saitama asked. "I wanna just go collect that bonus already."

"True... but still, he said he's connected with Zeniru... right?" Soba said, a look of greed on his eyes. Having a connection with such a powerful individual would only bring benefits! And according to this butler, he might've actually helped Zeniru out by killing the Paradisers!

" _Ah... I get it. But I don't really need it, though. I mean, I already know Genus, and Zeniru is even further below him."_ Saitama thought, understanding what Soba was hinting at.

"Right. You already know Genus... well, contacts are still good, right?" Soba sighed. Saitama already knew Genus, and a favor from him was basically priceless. Even if Zeniru competed with his entire wealth, the 3rd most powerful person on Earth, Chairman- well, former Chairman Genus was basically comparing a feather and a 10 ton weight. Even if he was retired, he was sure to have some personal fortune, right? And that personal fortune, even if it was just 1% of his original net worth, would trounce Zeniru multiple times over.

Needless to say, Soba envied Saitama for having such a priceless connection. He was basically set for life! That favor would be worth maybe three or four entire city blocks, or at the very least, 5% of the entirety of City A! 5% may not seem much, but remember, this was City A, the literal center of mankind, being the very first city built for the world-unification program held back in the 27th Century. Hundreds of years later, City A still thrives!

"Well, then, this way." Sonic said, leading them. Meanwhile, Hammerhead was obediently following them, considering he can absolutely ZERO chance of escaping.

 **[30 minutes later, Zeniru's posh-penthouse...}**

"Man, this place is still impressive." Saitama commented. Even after seeing it many times before, actually being right next to the building, and actually about to enter the building, it was another thing entirely.

" _Being right next to your target yet being unable to accomplish your mission..."_ Hammerhead mentally groaned, as he had arrived to where he wanted to wreck right after destroying his main source of income, yet he was unable to do anything. He wasn't restrained by chains or anything, those would be nothing against power armor. But he was mulled into obedience, seeing as the 'Heavenly Dragon' was right in front of him. Seeing how he had destroyed his underlings's battle-suits like butter, he knew better than to resist. Not mentioning using 100% of the suit, 100 suits at 100% capacity were basically jokes in front of the 'Heavenly Dragon'.

The butler moved to the lift, and pressed a button which was purple in color, and a poop logo on it.

" _Whoever designed the button should be fired. This isn't like balancing a million-ton gold ice-cream statue on a building, this is just a logo. Don't tell me the poop was intentional?"_ Saitama inwardly sighed. Out of all the possible designs, a purple poop ends up as Zeniru's logo on his lift. It HAD to be intentional, or else someone was fired.

Entering the lift, they soon realized one small problem.

Hammerhead's suit was too big, and even if they could fit, they would be squeezing.

"Take off the suit. It's too big, and suit or no suit, you won't win against us." Sonic, realizing this, ordered Hammerhead. Well, not like Hammerhead could do anything about it.

"EH!? B-but I'm not wearing anything underneath..." Hammerhead said, to which Yona blushed, whereas Soba and Saitama sighed. Awada and Sonic had no reaction.

"Hmm, standing before Zeniru unclothed would be less than sightly... very well. I, Hammerhead and... that reminds me, I haven't gotten your name?" Sonic asked Soba.

"Oh, right. I'm Soba, Hito Soba." Soba introduced himself.

"Ah, Mr Soba. Well then, me, this cretin-" Sonic pointed to Hammerhead, much to his displeasure at being called a 'cretin. "-and Mr Soba will be going first. If you could take the next lift?" Sonic asked the other three, compromising of Saitama, Awada, and Yona.

"That's fine." Saitama responded.

As Sonic, Hammerhead and Soba entered the lift and left, Awada and Yona looked to Saitama for answers.

"...don't look at me. I'm not telling. At least, for your own good." Saitama responded. He didn't want his coworkers to blame him for their nightmares, right? Not to mention they'd distance themselves from Soba for who knows how long after learning he basically brutally butchered a bunch of people? Well, it was the norm for Saitama, whom was a wannabe-hero back then, to see blood, guts and viscera. But these two...?

They might gain PTSD for all he knew. Last time Awada fainted because someone accidentally broke their arm in the office. Well, it could be justified by the fact that it was bent weirdly and really out-of-place. It also looked like it really hurt. Then again, breaking an arm tends to hurt anyway, so yeah. And Yona cried over a paper-cut. Now imagine knowing that Soba had killed... tens of hundreds of people. At least, maybe around a hundred or so.

"Come on, what happened earlier? The whole place was wrecked!" Yona asked.

"No." Saitama said simply.

"Please?" Yona asked again, not wanting to take no for an answer.

"Oh look, the lift's arrived. Let's go." Saitama said, changing the topic.

 **{The Top Floor, Zeniru's main residence...}**

"Hmph. So this is Hammerhead, the one who led the so-called 'Paradisers' in an attempt to destroy my house?" A fat, tan blond man spat, looking down on Hammerhead, whom was kneeling before him.

"Sonic, I am impressed at your handiwork. To finish them all off so fast within such a short period of time, no less?" Zeniru praised Sonic.

"It was not me, whom killed them all, Mr Zeniru. Instead, it is this man, over here." Sonic pointed at Soba.

"Oh, him? Thank you for your efforts, then! I didn't think someone like Sonic would appear! I'd hire you as my bodyguard, but I already have Sonic, over here." Zeniru said, pointing at Sonic. "But, a deed like this must not go unrewarded. I'll pay you as much as you want- within reason, of course." Zeniru said, laughing at the last part. Of course, he could afford practically anything, with only a scant amount of things he wouldn't be able to afford.

"O-oh! Thanks!" Soba thanked sheepishly. "A-any amount is fine, really."

"Hmm... alright. How's 200 million yen wired to you account? I trust you have one?" Zeniru asked.

"O-of course! T-thank you very much!" Soba thanked, bowing at a 90 degree angle, the same way he did when Genus was in front of him.

"Hahahaha! No need to be so anxious, I'm a very friendly person, really." Zeniru said, getting off his chair, patting Soba on his shoulder.

"Anyway, I need to be going. Please, go ahead and enjoy the refreshments before you leave!" Zeniru offered. He then ordered another butler to wire the money to Soba's account, and then he left for another room immediately.

"W-where'd he go?" Soba asked Sonic.

"Oh, Mr Zeniru was in the middle of some business earlier, but then he was interrupted when he heard that the paradisers were launching an attack on him." Sonic answered.

"I see. What was he doing?" Soba asked again.

"Well... let's just say it's better off if you don't know." Sonic said vaguely.

" _Oh... must be rich people kinks. I heard rich people can afford anything to fulfill their sick desires... Hopefully his isn't that bad..."_ Soba thought.

 **{In Zeniru's private room...}**

"Now this. This is the life." Zeniru said to himself. What he was currently doing in his room was-

"Would you like some tea, goshujin-sama?"

-being served by his genetically-engineered catgirl maids.

" _Man, I lost count how many times I had to continue funding the underground scientists to research genetic engineering just for this. The moment I heard that they had a breakthrough, I literally came in my pants right then and there."_ Zeniru thought. "Of course, I would love some." Zeniru answered his slave-maid.

The only reason they were slaves were because they were literally Zeniru's property. But other than that, he still treats them humanely.

"Of course, Master Zeniru." The maid answered, before a loud clang sounded out from the other room.

"What was that?" Zeniru asked.

" _Sigh..._ That must be-" The catgirl-maid sighed, but was then interrupted by another loud clang, with another, blond-haired catgirl maid stomping out the room, covered in what seems to be whipped cream.

"Master Zeniru! Please allow us to be more strict with-" Before she finished her sentence, a third catgirl leapt out of the room, completely white.

"Nishishishi... catch me if you can~" The third catgirl-maid teased, being covered entirely with flour and whipped cream.

"That's enough!" The first catgirl maid ordered sternly. She had black hair and brown eyes.

"Nyeh... big sis is no fun~" The catgirl in all white teased.

"L-lil sis! Stop! Master Zeniru is watching!" The blond-haired catgirl said, which finally quieted the flour and cream covered catgirl.

"HAHAHAHA! It's fine, it's fine. Just remember to take the lessons seriously. After all, your seniors are teaching you with their heart and soul." Zeniru mused.

"See, even master is alright with it~" The flour covered catgirl relaxed after hearing that Zeniru didn't mind.

"M-master, please don't encourage her!" The blond-haired catgirl complained.

"It's fine. You may be my maids, but you are my beloved children and pets first and foremost. Being a maid is just an added bonus." Zeniru said. "The uniforms are crucial, though." Zeniru added.

Usually, being the child and pet of someone at the same time would be morally wrong, but the catgirls themselves technically didn't even exist, being tightly kept secrets themselves, known to only a select few, Zeniru could call them whatever he wanted.

"Yes master~" The three said in unison.

" _This is better than heaven itself. If someone discovered a method to manipulate DNA to the point they can create a new species, if the first thing they did wasn't creating catgirls, something is wrong with their brain."_ Zeniru thought, enjoying his little slice of paradise.

 **{In an inconspicuous takoyaki shop...}**

"Achoo!" A certain genius sneezed.

"Genus Alpha! Are you alright?" A clone of Genus's asked.

"I'm fine. I just sneezed, that's all." Genus answered.

"Strange, didn't we do away with sicknesses like the common cold already when we genetically altered ourselves?" The clone wondered.

"The viruses must've evolved. I'll make it a point to re-engineer ourselves. Improving the physical capabilities of our bodies would be useful, as well." The original Genus, codenamed Genus Alpha made a mental note.

"That, or someone's talking behind your back." Frog-man suggested as he unpacked the new frying equipment.

"Utterly unscientific." The two Genuses said immediately.

 **{The hallway between the lift and a massive door}**

"SaitamaSaitamaSaitamaSaitamaSaitama-" Yona continuously annoyed Saitama to tell her what happened.

On the other hand, Saitama simply ignored her with the divine ability of making people disappear. Well, at least for himself. It was a useful skill no matter the occasion.

Awada was simply walking on the other side, awkwardly accepting the current situation.

"We're about to enter their room. Yona, for the love of my printer, please at least behave." Saitama sighed, before pushing the door open to see-

-Soba and the butler that escorted them earlier locked in an intense battle.

"Not bad... not bad indeed. You truly are a masterful warrior. Some from the village wouldn't even hold a candle to you." Sonic commented, smiling gleefully- well, more like a maniac.

"You're not so bad yourself. Your physical strength needs work, but your speed is excellent! I'm impressed. Really, I am." Soba praised.

" _Sigh..._ now what?" Saitama sighed.

"E-eh!? When did you guys get here?!" Soba asked, shocked.

"Literally just earlier." Saitama deadpanned.

"W-what's going on?" Yona asked.

"All because I agreed to a bout..." Soba facepalmed, before explaining,

"I'm a former underground pro-fighter. I kept this a secret." Soba revealed to everyone.

Everyone, with the exception of Sonic and Saitama, was obviously shocked by the revelation.

" _So he used to be part of the underground like me? Intriguing."_ Sonic thought.

" _A former pro-fighter? I wonder if he's strong..."_ Saitama wondered.

Awada had a look of surprise on his face, and Yona had her mouth wide open.

Awada was the first to break the awkward silence by asking, "S-so you were formerly a pro-fighter?"

"Yep. A damn good one, if I say so myself." Soba confirmed.

"So your previous job description of being a former soba-chef was a lie?" Awada asked.

"Ah- no, I was an actual soba-chef after I quit underground fighting. I was damn good at it as well, actually. Come to think of it, I'm pretty good at making noodles in general." Soba explained.

"I-I see... _phew..._ " Awada said, sighing in relief. "At least the documents don't need changing."

"Oh right, about that, I may as well come clean, I actually am homosexual. I lied about that bit in my resume." Soba confessed.

At that confession, everyone, including Saitama and Sonic was shocked.

"N-no way~" Awada said, slumping down in defeat.

"Hey, I already confessed to being a former underground fighter, being gay isn't all that much of a surprise, is it?" Soba asked.

"Well, no. I can speak for Awada here, changing the employee documents are actually a massive hassle. Despite all the high-tech computers, we keep personal documents in paper form only to protect a good bit of your privacy. Even if it is just about your sexuality. The fact that you're gay, though..." Saitama then went into contemplation.

"Now that makes more sense... I was wondering why that there were two guys under that horse-" Saitama wanted to say, but was then interrupted by Soba.

By interrupted, Soba tackled Saitama and covered his mouth with his hand.

"Shhhhhh! I already confessed two secrets, Saitama, please don't reveal this one yet- or rather at all!" Soba pleaded.

"Ah, oops. Almost let that slip." Saitama nonchalantly said.

"'Ah, oops'?! You almost let out my deepest secret! What the hell man?!" Soba said, panicked. A second later, all of his pride and respect would've been completely gone.

"Now I'm really, really curious! What's with the secrets?!" Yona yelled.

"Soba's an underground fighter, and he's gay! I know that now. But what horse? What guy? Why the secrets?!" Yona said in exasperation.

"Yeah you're not getting the answer." Saitama answered simply.

"GRRRRR!" Yona growled, jumping at Saitama, comically biting at his head.

"So anyway, was there anything we were needed for?" Saitama asked, ignoring the rabid Yona currently biting his head.

"Hm. Not really, no. Mr Zeniru simply wanted to reward Mr Soba for taking out the Paradisers." Sonic answered.

"Okay. Can we go now?" Saitama asked.

"Well, you can go any time you'd like. Zeniru has already wired the money to Mr Soba's account." Sonic said. "But, I'd prefer to finish the bout with Mr Soba." Sonic added.

"Hm? Ah, right. Why were you guys fighting earlier?" Saitama asked.

"Well, I was interested how Mr Soba could take down those Paradisers so easily, and so I requested that we have a little spar." Sonic explained.

"And so we ended up sparring for a bit, until you guys came along." Soba added.

"Uh-huh. Alright we can go now, right?" Saitama asked.

"I said that you may already leave, but if possible, I'd prefer if I could finish the spar with Mr Soba if possible." Sonic said.

"Fine. Soba, finish up quickly, would you?" Saitama groaned. "We'll go first."

As soon as Saitama and the rest left, Sonic and Soba looked at each other, and said,

"Alright, Sonic. Let's finish this, eh?"

"Of course, Mr Soba. I wouldn't want to keep you waiting."

 **[An indefinite amount of time later...]**

"Ah, Soba caught up to us." Awada noted after a gust of wind blew by and Soba appeared.

"Hey, guys." Soba said, stopping his sprint, and walked at a normal pace like everyone else.

"Jeez, if you're so strong, why not be a hero?" Yona asked.

"Maybe cause of the better pay." Saitama reasoned.

"Yep. I actually thought about being a pro-hero if getting another, more stable job didn't work out." Soba answered.

"Actually, some A-Class and all S-Class heroes get paid a lot! Compared to our pay, anyway." Yona said.

"Well, not accounting Awada's." Saitama looked at Awada.

"Well, being a Branch Manager of the Operations Department, Awada obviously has better pay." Soba added.

"Come on, guys! Being a Branch Manager isn't all that much..." Awada said humbly.

"Seriously? You get a miniature cooler in your office and you say it's not all that good? Oh yeah... having a mini-fridge and a personal office is not all that good..." Saitama said sarcastically.

"What's his monthly salary again?" Soba asked.

"Around 3 million yen." Saitama answered.

"Actually, it's only 2.7 million yen..." Awada clarified.

"Monthly." Saitama added.

"Rich guy..." Soba and Yona said in unison.

"Now, now, it may seem a lot, but really, it's not! I mean, Miss Shiro from the Finance Department makes way more!" Awada said.

"Well, duh. She's the Chief Financial Officer. Of course she gets paid more. Hell, I think she's running to get a CEO position now." Saitama retorted.

"Oh, right. I never asked. Who's this 'Miss Shiro' we've heard about?" Soba asked Saitama.

"Yeah, yeah, who's that? I sometimes hear you and Awada talking about her whenever you guys were in the lounge!" Yona asked as well.

"Ah, I forgot you guys came in a bit later than us, so you were trained under someone else." Saitama said.

"Miss Shiro... brings back memories..." Awada said, smiling.

"When I and Awada first joined the company, she was our senior." Saitama answered.

"Sometimes she's fierce..." Awada smiled.

"And sometimes she's really kind." Saitama reminisced.

"Sometimes she's incredibly good at work! That time we struggled to finish that pile of paperwork, she knocked it down in less than an hour!" Awada praised her.

"...and sometimes she messes up. Real bad." Saitama snickered.

"Hahaha! Oh, right! That time she accidentally got us to the wrong city at the wrong time and the wrong day! All at once!" Awada remembered.

"Ah, the only time I saw her face was anything but pale-white." Saitama said, stifling a laugh. "I've seen red paint less red than her face at the time."

"So... she was the senior that trained you two?" Soba asked.

"Yep. We were all part of the first batch of interns, so us both were working under Miss Shiro at the time, before we actually became real employees." Saitama answered.

"Ah... our internship. I remember that I needed Saitama to basically carry me at the time." Awada said, remembering his intern days.

"Hmph, don't need to say any more. Had I not helped you so much, you might not have even been able to secure the job." Saitama said jokingly.

"Yep, I might even be stuck in internship forever!" Awada joked back.

"Well, anyway, Miss Shiro was the senior that trained me and Awada, and is the current Chief Financial Officer, and I think she's planning to run for a CEO position soon enough." Saitama answered Soba's question.

"Wait... the Chief Financial Officer? You can't be saying that- wait, hold on..." Soba then went deep in thought.

"Miss Shiro... Shirosagi Tsukikari... ARE YOU SAYING YOU GUYS WERE TRAINED UNDER SHIROSAGI TSUKIKARI, THE CHIEF FINANCIAL OFFICER!?" Soba yelled in shock from this revelation.

"Dude. We literally just said that." Saitama said after uncovering his ears. "Also, stop shouting. We're still in public."

True enough, some people stopped what they were doing and looked at them due to the shout earlier.

"We should get going." Saitama said, walking briskly, as so to get away from the current location as fast as possible as to not attract attention.

 **[15 minutes later...]**

"...and we're in Greyreach." Saitama hinted at an Elder Parchment V: Ymirsk reference.

...which was sadly not understood as the three others looked at him in confusion.

"Come on. Yona and Awada I understand. But Soba? Seriously, did you not play games in your childhood?" Saitama asked.

"I did, but I don't think I'm getting that reference at all?" Soba said, still confused.

"Elder Parchment V: Ymirsk. What the hell." Saitama said disappointedly. "What did you play as a kid? Angry Barrels?"

"Ouch... I never got the opportunity to play Elder Parchment V: Ymirsk, so I don't know understand that reference. But Angry Barrels... dude, my heart." Soba said, comically clutching his heart in anguish.

"Mobile Gamer." Saitama said, as all his respect for Soba, however minuscule the remainder was, had utterly evaporated into nothingness.

"I'm not!" Soba defended himself vehemently.

"Whatever. Anyway, we're here." Saitama said, pointing out that they had arrived back at their main workplace in City A, Meliorem Group Headquarters.

"I always wondered what 'Meliorem' meant..." Yona wondered aloud, looking at the name of the building, advertised on itself.

"I think I read this before. It meant 'improve' in Latin or something..." Soba tried to explain.

"It is. Meliorem means 'improve' in Latin. The first chairman, Genus the 1st, said that it was a group whose goal was improvement of humanity in general, hence the name." Awada explained.

"Hey, how do you know that?" Soba asked.

"Well, we're told that when we first join. Remember when we first join, there's a New Employees Reception Event, right?" Awada asked.

"Oh, yeah. Was that part of the long speech that they had at the time?" Saitama asked.

"Yep. And also, once you get to a position higher than a floor manager, like a branch manager, you get to go for another gathering, and there's a second speech during THAT reception, but it's not as long, though." Awada said.

"What we also got as part of being a branch manager is our own personal office, like I do, and we also have a poster of the first chairman, with his famous quote underneath, which was 'Strive to improve, for that is what makes a human.' That poster is in every single personal office." Awada added. "Hey, Saitama, didn't you notice the poster in my office? It was always right beside the coffee maker."

"Really? I never noticed." Saitama said, stroking his chin in thought.

"Saitama's not the observant type, huh?" Soba joked.

"Shut it, you mobile gamer." Saitama shot, which caused Soba to comically clutch his heart in agony again.

 **{Saitama's Cubicle, 15 minutes later...]**

Going back to the everyday grind, Saitama was back in his cubicle, doing his work. After everyone collected their bonus, everyone went back to their respective places at once.

"Alrighty. The 500,000 yen bonus! Time to splurge when I get back. Been some time since I had good hotpot. Though trying out new foods isn't all that bad either..." Saitama said to himself.

Putting the bonus into his wallet, it went from normal-sized to stupid-thick. Anyway, Saitama was actually allowed to go back for the day, since he and the others were actually expected to finish up a few days later, they were basically free until then. Soba had already left, Yona was back in the lounge enjoying juice, and Awada... Awada had stuff to do. As Branch Manager, he was obviously way busier than everyone else.

Saitama... Saitama just went back to work. Since he was actually free until then, this actually counted as overtime, so he'd enjoy another pay-boost. Money was something that drove Saitama to the utmost limits. Well, then again, it drove everyone to the utmost limits. It just worked on Saitama a little better.

Getting on his computer, he received the assignments he was given, and started work.

 **[6 hours later, 5.p.m...]**

Saitama stretched himself, as he yawned. As world-shakingly strong as he was, sitting in the same spot for over 6 hours doing work would be more boring than watching paint dry.

Getting up from his desk, everyone was still doing work as usual. It was only 5, after all. Everyone was allowed to go back home at 6 p.m, but with the OT pay? No way in hell. 5,000 yen per hour was serious cash. As Saitama's 6 hours weren't considered working hours, he was paid the usual OT-amount, which was 30,000 yen. A few more hours and he would have enough to pay for a month's rent. 10 hours of work for one month of rent? That was pretty much unheard of. Well, it had something to do with Saitama's place of living being dirt-cheap.

"I'll to go the lounge for a bit. Get some sandwiches." Saitama said, getting up to go to the middle-floors.

 **{The Lounge-floor...}**

Saitama arrived at the lounge, moving towards the snack bar. The previous mayo and seaweed sandwiches were replaced with... ham and cheese. Well, at least today's sandwiches made sense.

Grabbing a few, he ate one while bringing the rest to his cubicle. He was planning to eat while working.

 **{Saitama's cubicle (again)}**

Placing the other two sandwiches on the side, he went back to work. But as he turned the screen on, he saw a notification.

"Hm? Out of aluminium... Wait, didn't I already ask Awada to get them to restock on aluminium already? We were critically low on aluminium already, which was why I sent word to Awada..." Saitama wondered. "Why do we need aluminium, anyway? Doesn't the main company just like, manages the other company subsidiaries?" Saitama asked himself.

"Well, if you wanna do something right, you gotta do it yourself, I guess. I'm just going to go look for the guys in charge of stock myself." Saitama said, getting back out from his seat.

Sighing, he said to himself, "I hope this doesn't end up like that one time..."

 **{Basement...}**

As the lift opened, Saitama was greeted with the as-usual musty smell of the storerooms. The basement was used as a storage facility for stock, like old computers, toilet paper, file binders, etc. Everything that would be needed would be located here. Well, everything inorganic, at least. But apart form that, anything conceivable that could or would be used in an office setting was there. Everything, too. Aside from things like those, there were also other things.

Such as toilet paper, detergent, a Cthulhu shrine, adult diapers, sleeping bags, sacrificial knives, ironing boards, guns, ammunition, gas masks, potted plants...

Wait... something wasn't right there.

Guns? Ammunition? Gas masks?

"Eh? When were these here?" Saitama said, looking at the guns poking out from a duffle bag, along with some gas masks and ammunition. Those were definitely not meant to be here...

The security guards's armory was on the 6th floor, and all they had were handguns, tasers, and batons! And they were only authorized to carry Five-SeveNs!

...When did security get AK-47s, Galil-ARs, Sawed-Offs, Tec-9s... and some grenades? And was that a Negev?

Okay, something was definitely going on here.

As Saitama picked up a gun to take a look, a voice called out from behind.

"Ey, someone found the stash!"

Turning around, Saitama saw it was a black-skinned man wearing a suit, followed by some other people whom were all wearing formal attire. They were all wearing sunglasses. Except one, who was wearing aviator ones, which made him look more intimidating.

"Oh? Good. We don't need to waste time. There's already a hostage ripe for us to use." Another man said. He was wearing aviator sunglasses and had the look of a seasoned veteran.

"Boss, you think we should get another one? Just in case?" A thick-bearded man asked.

"We should, but I think one's enough. Not like they'd be able to resist or anything." A man with a buzz-cut suggested.

"Don't underestimate them. All of them have received at least some level of self-defense classes provided, so don't go thinking they're your average civilian. If you turn your back on them, they'll be able to take you by surprise." The leader among them warned.

"Alright. You there, put yo hands up if you don't wanna die!" The black-skinned one said, pointing a gun at him.

 _"Sigh... come on. Really?"_ Saitama mentally sighed. Well, he could just take them all down now. But as he thought about taking them down, he remembered a certain something from his employee manual. Yes, he did read his employee manual, just not all that much. He hadn't even gotten through half of the book before losing it somehow.

Either way, there was something else stated in the manual.

" _Section 4;21, if an employee is taken hostage and/or used by malicious forces against the company, the employee will not only be not responsible for the act, but the employee will also be given money as compensation due to failure of security and paid leave (depending on situation) if deemed unfit for work."_

Remembering that, a smile came onto Saitama's face.

"Hey, what'chu smiling for, huh? I said get yo ass down!" The black-skinned man threatened, cocking his Desert Eagle.

"Alright, alright." Saitama said, getting down on his knees and placing his hands behind his head.

" _Compensation, huh... I wonder how much."_ Saitama thought to himself.

* * *

 **Here's Chapter 7! Give reviews on your opinions, and as usual, more information below.**

 **1) Soba being gay was just a twist I thought about in the very last second. I literally went: "Hmm, what should I do to make an unexpected twist that won't help the story whatsoever in the short run? Oh, I know! Make him gay!" It IS actually part of the story, though, despite being meant to be only a joke. Who knows, maybe it'll be helpful in later chapters or something. And yes, I know. It seems like I'm making fun of gay people. Don't worry, no actual offense meant. Though if you'd like it to offend you, I'm perfectly happy with that.**

 **2) Saitama got his job 31536000 seconds after he started training.**

 **3) Elder Parchment V: Ymirsk is an obvious nod to Elder Scrolls: Skyrim, with Ymirsk being an anagram of Skyrim. Angry Barrels was meant to be a knockoff of Angry Birds, before I searched it on Google just in-case and I realized that someone had actually made a video on that. Well aren't I the uncultured swine?**


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